Mustard Seed Faith

Mama's Little Snugglebug!

2011-11-23T09:17:00.009-06:00

I am so very sorry that I have neglected this blog....life just has become SO busy and without having internet always connected at home it's hard to just sit home and blog. If it was easy to do from my phone, I'd blog all the time! :) So hopefully this will catch everyone up on my life for the past 5 months! :)

I am soooo incredibly blessed to announce that I gave birth to our SON, Layton, on August 3rd. First I have to say, he is the most amazing baby and I could never have dreamed of a better son! I'm not just saying this either....I love him more than I ever thought I could possibly love...it's amazing the LOVE God gives you for your child...!!!! THANK YOU JESUS!!

SOOO..... by the middle to end of July I was pretty regularly having contractions and thinking it was the real thing. They would hurt, last a long time, but sadly after like 7 hours they would fizzle out...I felt like I would NEVER go into REAL labor.... My best friend Bethany drove up with her brother from OK as soon as we were sure it was getting close to that time...wont get too graphic there, but we WERE sure it'd be within a week or so! :) So I had a great time spending my last few pregnant days with her just walking the mall or doing whatever I could to bring on labor! :) On August, 2nd my husband took me out on a little date night, I think to get my mind off trying to get our baby to come! :) We went out for a nice dinner and then he gave me a Willow Tree he had bought of a husband and wife holding their baby...oh how I longed that could be us soon!!! Little did I know it'd be VERY soon! :) Around 11:45 that night contractions started....I knew they weren't real because everyone had told me...oh when it's the real thing, they wont hurt and they'll be 20 minutes apart....well mine were 5 min. apart and painful! SO I got in the tub thinking they would eventually stop. Around 12:15 I got out and told Aaron I was just in so much pain! He was actually a little upset because he said he needed sleep for the next day of work, it was a big day! LOL I told him I'd just go in the babys room then, because I couldn't lay down...so I went in there and sat for like a minute and came back to him saying how bad I hurt! :) So we got out my phone and started timing the contractions...they were 2-3 min. apart and stronger each time....oh boy did they hurt! I remember Aaron saying to me, "Think it's the real thing??" Then I thought no way! How could they possibly be real if they started so strong and close! So we called the doula, Noel, to just see what she thought. Of course....no answer, it WAS in the middle of the night....so I told Aaron I'd be fine....well that lasted 2 minutes...by then I was telling him to call the midwife! Still all at this time I was thinking they were fake but I just didn't know what to do, I was hurting so bad. So he called the midwife and guess what! No answer! :) Well this particular night we had Bethany's brother staying at our house so my next concern was him....I told Aaron to call his parents and have them come get him! :) Our room is very cramped and it just wasn't going so well pacing back and forth in there and I didn't want to go in the living room by him. Soo...they ANSWERED! and came right away! By this time Aaron knew it was the real thing but I still doubted. When Aaron's Mom came she assured Aaron it was real as well. By this time we had gotten ahold of both the midwife and Noel, and they were both on their way.

When the midwife came they asked what my pain level was and then pretty soon after had me start pushing. They filled up the pool for me in our living room so I could get in there to push. Oh that water felt SOOO good!!! Aaron's Mom was wonderful refilling it everytime with hot water for me. By this time my sisters had been called as well and were on their way and my friend Danyelle was coming to take pictures. We were going to have quite the housefull. :) Seeing that my contractions were coming on so quick I thought for sure my sisters would miss the birth, but I didn't care then, I just wanted that baby out. :)

Okay, I really need to condense this story, otherwise it'd be a book! :) I'll leave out a lot of in between stuff....after MANY hours of pain and pushing and jumping in and out of the pool, the decision was made to go to the hospital. My water had been broken for awhile now, I had pushed over 5 hours and I felt like dying. I had absolutely no energy, I couldn't eat or drink, had thrown up everything that was already in me and just was physically worn out. My sisters had made it by this time with hours to spare. Who knew it would take so long!

I need to say first, I was TOTALLY against a hospital birth....there was absolutely NO WAY I'd have my baby in the hospital, I was terrified of the idea even. Aaron and I had discussed it while I was pregnant and I just really wanted a water birth at home. But we prayed anyway saying, "Lord, we want this baby to be born where YOU would have..." We knew that if planned a home birth and He wanted us at a hospital He would make it happen. And He did...I was still SO against it though, so Aaron carried me to the car and his Mom drove us, Bethany and Aaron were in back and my sisters drove seperate. We raced to the hospital but I still continued to push in the car because I thought it'd be better to be born there than in that hospital! Man, was I stubborn!!
All I remember was getting to the ER and I was screaming and then wheeled me as fast as they could up to L&D and got me on the bed fast. It all went SO fast from there....20 minutes later, with the help of the doctor, my SON was born!! Here was my first reactions "A BOY??!?!? Look at his poor head! :( Aaron, look at his ears!! :( He is SO big, he's got to weigh 10 lbs!" It wasn't exactly the loving motherly response....He had been in the birthing canal SO long that his poor head was very coned shape and his ear was folded over and like stuck and they were HAIRY!!!! He didn't have hair on his back or anything just on his had and EARS! LOL The Dr. said not to worry it'd fall off, but let me tell you, it's still there!!! LOL I love it though! :)

After he was born I was still SO exhausted, the Dr. gave me a shot of pitocin to because he said my uterus was like flattened from pushing for sooo long, they had to start contractions back up to deliver the placenta. I was scared about all of that but it was a breeze! :) So after washing him off and weighing him they brought my son back to me. We named him Layton Russell, his middle name after Aaron's grandpa who he was VERY close to! A man I really wish I could have met! Layton weighed 8.1 and was 20 in. long.. not so big after all! I was counting on having a 10 lb baby! He looked IDENTICAL to his daddy when he was born!

Layton was born on a Wednesday and by Saturday we finally got to go home...it was one thing after another, but by Saturday we brought our healthy baby boy home. He had become very jaundice and we had to stay longer to have him under lights. That was soo hard for me, seeing him strapped into this little bed thing....I cried and cried.. :(

Saturday was wonderful though, our little family was FINALLY going home!!!! Layton had dropped to 7.11 I think when we left on Sat. so Monday they sent a home nurse to check on his counts and weigh him and stuff...she told us, don't be scared if he's lost weight, baby's usually take 2 weeks to regain birth weight....well not our little chunker! He was at 8.6 already!!! Then at his one week appt. he was at 8.12!!! He was growing SOOOO fast!

Okay so now I have to say this.... I'm really thankful that God had Layton born where HE wanted....I needed that! My fear wasn't right and my experience with a hospital birth was absolutely wonderful!! They all were SO nice and respectful of our wishes with vaccinating and different things. If anything, I'm scared of a home birth now. lol There are reasons why my home birth didn't go so well, I wont go into those here, but there were things that probably should have been done that weren't and they would have helped a lot! The Dr. did them once I got to the hospital and Layton was born right away. Anyway....all this to say, I loved my hospital birth and I'm glad that God is concerned with the little details in life!
No one warned me about this overwhelming joy that comes after having a baby....I didn't know that this love was even possible. I love my Mom, and I love my husband...a LOT, don't get me wrong, but there is something about having your own child....it seems like the first week everytime I'd rock him or nurse him I'd be crying tears of joy, soo thankful that God had given him to me. I wasn't prepared to love my child so much...that sounds silly I know, but seriously it is hands down THE.MOST.AMAZING.THING ever!!!!! Aaron and I could not be happier!!

So now 16 weeks later I am even more in love and have the most wonderful son in the world!! He is growing up too fast and is learning SO much!! He tries all the time to sit up on his own and can do it if I sit him up...he scoots everywhere on his back and just about roll over!!! Did I mention he isn't even 4 months yet!! ;) He smiles ALL the time and is starting to really giggle a lot too!!

The last two days he has seemed to just REALLY grow up, I can't exactly even pin point what it is, but he seems so much older to us.... he was so sweet yesterday we BOTH took a nap and we were laying in my bed and I was HOPING to stay asleep an hour or so, but no, my son wanted a little cat nap, so he woke me up not by squirming around or whining but by sticking his fingers in.my.mouth!!! LOL I opened my eyes to find him all smiley and bright eyed!! It was just so cute!!

Alright, I better get going, he is napping now and I have other things I need to get done! Trying to get my house very clean today so I can decorate for C.H.R.I.S.T.M.A.S. on Friday!! :) I've been waiting SOO long to do it! :) Knew I couldn't before thanksgiving! :)

Hope I didn't bore you all with my birth story, but I had to at least announce that he IS here!! And he's NOT a girl!! LOL Oh, and I have to say...I think I'll take all sons! I LOVE having a little BOY!!

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!

(Almost 2 months old)

(15 weeks)

(almost 3 months)

(6 weeks old)

(on a walk with mommy)

(Aunt Besh aka Bethany came to visit- 14 weeks)(15 weeks)(sitting up on his own!)

(He L.O.V.E.S bath time!!!)

Maternity Pictures!

2011-07-12T17:13:00.011-05:00

While we were in MO last time, we had Stephen Schuknecht take our maternity pictures for us! He does and great job and is wonderful to work with! I'm not totally happy with them, but NOT because of him....I just look like I'm in tons of pain or something. I felt like I was smiling, but clearly I wasn't. Seriously people, I don't look like this always! :) I DO know how to smile! ;)

Here are some of the pictures from the day! :)

Less than 6 weeks left....

2011-06-27T16:22:00.003-05:00

Just have a few pictures to post, but once again thought I'd update you all! We are getting SOOO excited to have this baby here! We started taking bets on what the gender will be, the weight and the date of birth! :) We'll see who gets the closest! For fun, leave a comment with your guess as well! :) I'm due the 6th, just so you don't have to do the math. Boy? Girl? July 27th or Aug. 11th? 6 lbs or 15 lbs? LOL (Let's hope not 15 lbs!!) :D

The nursery is JUST about all put together!! Crib is done, room is painted, just waiting to get the bedding washed and put on the mattress.

My sister threw me a baby shower a couple weeks ago in Missouri also, which was WONDERFUL!! Thank you Mandy! :) We got tons of nice things, we are so blessed! One of the things we got was a bassinet, so that is up as well and ready to be put in our room!! :) Can you tell we are excited?!

Okay here's the pics now! :)

30 weeks

34 weeks...getting HUGE! :)

Growing Baby!

2011-05-10T15:51:00.004-05:00

Well, I haven't been so faithful updating this blog lately but I have time now, so I am! :) Most of you are on facebook so have seen these pictures, but just in case some of my friends aren't, these are for you! :) Baby Schuler is doing wonderful!! Kicks ALL the time and even pops out ocasionally for me to grab it's foot or see it's arm or leg. (Can't quite tell the difference of some parts through my belly!) It's SOOOO neat though! I love feeling our baby move and kick!

According to my baby application on my phone, our baby is 15 inches long from head to toe and 2.2 lbs. It's amazing to think something that big is growing inside of me! We feel soo incredibly blessed that God chose to give us a little blessing! Sometime I will have to share our story how God did a miracle for us by bringing us our baby! :)

I'm starting this week to paint and get the nursery ready...I'm SO excited to get it done!! Lord willing it will be done soon! :)

Well here are the progressive pictures of our little blessing!

Ultrasound from like 14 weeks! I'm sure it looks MUCH different now! But we aren't having anymore. :) I still think our baby here looks soo cute!

(18 weeks)

(2 days short of 24 weeks)

(One day short of 27 weeks...and now I'm almost 28 weeks!)

6 months!

2011-03-01T14:00:00.000-06:00

Today...sort of...marks 6 months since Aaron and I have been married! We say March 1st is, because there is no February 29th. It's funny though, yesterday, Feb. 28th, we celebrated one year since we started courting! We sure did things fast huh? :) The last year has been the most thrilling of my life though, I'd have to say! The Lord has definitely showed us both so much and taught us a ton! I'm soo thankful to Him for giving me such an awesome husband, he truly is the best! I could not have dreamed of a better man to marry! I was told so much that marriage is lots of work and fights and well good times too, but I was just really thinking, wow we are going to fight a TON! (Now, don't get me wrong, we DO get in arguments) but....the good times SOO out-weigh any bad time, so it's wonderful and those bad times are easily forgotten. :)

It's amazing also to think that in just six months we have gone from newlyweds to soon to be parents! For those of my blogger friends who don't know, YES, we are expecting! I am due Aug 6th, so that makes me 17 and 1/2 weeks today! The pregnancy has been wonderful, I'm just needing to learn to not worry so much about letting my stomach grow and stretch so much! This is a gift from God and I need to just be happy it's growing...right? :) I'll try!

Well, it's been forever since I've updated anyone, so I thought today was as good a day as any! I'll try to keep updated on here with growing pictures of our little one! Oh, and no we aren't finding out the gender....so we'll just have to surprise EVERYONE! :)

(12 weeks 5 days)

(14 weeks 4 days)

(17 weeks)

a FEW wedding pictures!!!!

2010-11-04T17:40:00.008-05:00

I don't have a ton of time to write but I wanted to get some wedding pictures on the blog finally! :) I'm waiting to have the ones of Aaron and I done (edited I mean) but heres just some that I've done. It's been quite the process, it's one thing editing photos for someones wedding that I've shot, but when it's your own it's like you want to save and treasure every photo, which can get exhausting when editing them! :) All I have left are the reception photos though and then I'll be done. I just HAD to get the others done because I have lovely HUGE frames to put all these in and put on the wall...its like a collage frame, so neat! :)

(They are in no specific order...I'm just in a hurry!)

Oh, and the trailer for our Wedding Video will be online soon, so I'll post a link soon, it's SOO good! :) Love it!

It's late

2010-08-07T04:13:00.003-05:00

....And I'm REALLY missing my Mom. :( This whole day has been kind of ummm bad for me! My fault though, I've just been very short with everyone and rather rude to those I love most. :( Tonight we went to a Relay For Life benefit thing and we were just part of the volleyball tournament...anyway, as I walked around the track and read all the names of local people who have died from cancer, I just couldn't get my Mom off my mind. :( Then on the way home I heard a song that my friend Mandy sang that was written for my Mom, and then after that another song that was at my Mom's funeral. Anyway...it's just been rough. I miss her SOO much! ;( As the wedding is getting closer and closer (3 weeks away) I'm wanting her here even more. With all this wedding planning it's like this HUGE part of my life is missing and it shows in all I do I feel like. How I would have loved to plan this wedding with her help, and have her there at the shower on Sunday, and her there to be escorted down the aisle at the wedding and to witness me marrying the love of my life, Aaron.

All the wishing in the world won't change that though. So I better just pray and let God fill that missing part...I'm trying, really I am, just seems about impossible. Still everytime I miss her like this..it hurts so bad, like someone is stabbing me. Emotional pain is worse than physical I think....

Please just pray for me...and for Aaron and me as we seek to keep the Lord first in everything, but as the wedding draws near, small details seem to get in the way and distract my focus.

Thanks!! Goodnight!

I've got news......

2010-05-18T08:53:00.000-05:00

I am engaged to the most WONDERFUL man on earth! I've been keeping things pretty quiet for awhile now, dropping just subtle hints here and there, but now I can tell the world! :) I guess I'm a little late though, seeing as though Mrs. Morris already did a post here and I haven't even blogged yet! :)

On Mother's Day, Aaron got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife! It was perfect! I was SOOO shocked..didn't expect it at all on that day, but it was the perfect day. So special to me! I'll just post a few pictures and then hopefully soon I'll write out the whole story for those of you who don't know everything! :)

Praise God for His many blessings!!!

(During our courtship)

(Opening gifts from my sister Tara after he proposed)

(These were taken right after...)

An Update

2010-04-29T17:11:00.004-05:00

Well, I was going through my comment moderation and saw Mrs. B's comment and thought I should do a blog post to answer her question. :) So, Mrs. B, THIS post is for YOU! ;)
Well, currently I am in Missouri and spending time with my sisters! My time with them has been really good. On Tuesday, I had the privildige to go to the Cardinals game with both of them! Can you believe it, it was our first game ever for us three to be at together! Best thing about the game was...THEY WON! GO CARDS!!!! :) We had perfect seats..Mandy got them through her work for her birthday, so we were in box seats and SOO close to the field!Thanks so much Mandy! Only bad part about the game....I was missing a certain someone a LOT...Next time!
o
Then yesterday Tara, Jason, Mandy, Joel and I all went to some sand volleyball court to play! At first the bugs were horrible so it wasn't as much fun as it could be, but once it got dark the lights turned on and that attracted the bugs to the light! :) We were the only ones there so that was cool!

During the days I've really just been relaxing I guess. :) Cleaned some at Taras today, but other than that I've really just been praying and reading God's Word, seeking His direction and praying for wisdom. I've been encouraged by a lot of scriptures this week also! I'll share some with you guys! :)

Proverbs 2:2-6 "Make your ear attentive to wisdom, Incline your heart to understanding; For if you cry for discernment, Lift your voice for understanding; If you see her as silver and search for her as for hidden treasures; then you will discern the fear of the Lord and discover the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding."

James 1:5 "But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him."

James 3:13-18 "Who among you is wise and understanding? Let him show by his good behavior his deeds in the gentleness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth. This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but is earthly, natural, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy. And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace."

then just two more..... James 1:2-4 "Consider it all JOY, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

James 1:12 "BLESSED is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him"

THAT is encouraging!! We all go through things, big or small, God is in control and as hard as it may be we need to take joy in it. I guess when I think of that first verse I relate it to running...lately I've been running and it's hard to have a lot of endurance. You want to start out fast and then it's hard to go very far because you become weary...but with trials in our lives, God is using that to produce endurance in us...to keep us going! It's weird to think like that but the more we are going through, the more our faith is tested, in the long run we will have an endurance like no other and will be able to withstand anything...things we think now that there is NO WAY we could go through that, but one day, with God preparing us... "getting us in shape" we can! :) Hope that makes some sense! :)

Okay...so moving on! :) Tomorrow I plan to spend the day with my Dad, which will be nice. It's been a LONG time since I've really got to just spend the day with him. I'm looking forward to it! Hmm...what else! Well Mrs. B, I know your probably wondering about OTHER news but...for now I'm keeping quiet! ;) Hopefully SOON, I can share something with you all! :) And post LOTS of pictures! I've got plenty, that's for sure! :)

Well I guess that is all for now. Unfortunately I can't edit pictures here or downsize pictures, so it's hard to post too many on here. Sometime I'll have to blog about our big dance we did, it was GREAT!

20 YEARS!

2010-04-20T13:43:00.004-05:00

It's hard to believe that my "LITTLE" sister is 20 years old today! :) Time is just flying by, and especially because we don't see eachother every day anymore. As sad as it seems, it took getting away for awhile to really fully appreciate the bond my sister and I had. We were so close! Did just about everything together and she was my best friend! I'm so thankful to have Mandy as my sister!

I hope you have a WONDERFUL birthday Mandy! I miss you a lot and can't wait to see you next month!

As you can see BOTH of my sisters can act QUITE crazy...I'm just glad her face didn't get stuck this way! ;) Mandy, I'm afraid Joel might be having second thoughts if so.... ;) Love you being this wild though! :D Your so much fun!

(Mandy and her boyfriend, Joel, they've been dating over 6 months now, he's great for her!)

I LOVE YOU MANDY!!!!!!!!

HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY!

Spring is about Here!

2010-03-12T15:13:00.005-06:00

Today was a beautiful day! :) At least to me it was...I guess it's been kind of on the verge of rain but it hasn't so that alone makes it beautiful, right?! :) (Ok, so your seeing I REALLY don't like rain!) ;) I ended up going outside earlier today and playing around with the boys. They were having bike races and so I ran in to get my camera to catch some of the action. :) Some of the older boys were busy cleaning up Jordan's mowers and getting him ready for his mowing season. So I bounced back and forth between everyone. :) Then, Kaleb, Isaac and I played BASEBALL! :) It was fun! Isaac and Kaleb are quite the hitters! I had to run out of the way real quick though after I pitched because they liked to line drive it RIGHT at me! :( Well, just wanted to post some of the pics from our day! :)

Goin' Country! :)

The Boys!

He got some air!! :) Pretty exciting!
NO SNOW!!! :) YAY!

Isaac :)

Life is Good! :)

2010-03-11T18:24:00.005-06:00

Well I know it must seem like I've completely forsaken this blog, but I haven't! :) We don't have internet in our home any longer so I don't get to the library THAT often and I especially don't blog everytime I come.

Life has been wonderful and I've been feeling incredibly blessed! :) I had the opportunity to shoot at a friends wedding last weekend in Missouri which was nice and some friends of mine from up here went with me, Danyelle and Andy. Danyelle is also a photographer so she helped me out a lot! :) Thanks!! :) If you'd like to see some wedding shots click HERE! :)

It's getting warmer here and I'm loving that also! I really REALLY enjoyed this winter and loved learning to ski, but now that the snow is gone I'm just ready for summer to get here! I'm not a fan of all the wetness we've been having but hopefully it will dry up quick and warm weather will be here to stay! :)

Here's just a few pics from what I've been up to! ;)

Anna Schuler :)

Aaron :)

We were playing Kemps! Aaron and I won!! :)

Jordan Schuler

I must not have wanted my picture taken! LOL

Gossip

2010-01-11T11:44:00.003-06:00

Today I was reading through my Bright Lights book and the subject today was on Gossip. I thought it would be like every other lesson I've read where there are certain things that really stick out and I can apply to my life and other things that I kind of just "pass by" but this subject has kind of hit me hard. I think gossip is something that almost EVERY lady or girl struggles with and it's something we are NOT aware of. We excuse the behavior very easily and make up excuses.

Here are a few verses on gossip:

Romans 1:29-32 "Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: who knowing the judgement of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them."

Leviticus 19:6 "Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people"

Psalm 101:5 "Whoso privily slandereth his neighbor, him will I cut off; him that hath a high look and a proud heart will not I suffer."

Proverbers 26:20 "Where no wood is, there the fire goeth out: so where there is no taleberarer, the strife ceaseth."

Ephesians 4:29 "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers."

God knew that us women would be this way also, because in 1 Timothy chapter 5, Paul says, "And withal they learn to be idle, wandering bout from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not. I will therefore that the younger woman marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion tot he adversary to speak reproachfully."

Gossip is so hard to control I think because it is so subtle. Negative things come out of our mouth all the time and we don't even think about what we are saying or what effects it may have on the person. In 2 Corinthians 10:5 Paul says, "Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ." THIS needs to be our goal.

I think we all REALLY need to step back and look at our lives, look at our conversation through email, texting, talking..whatever it may be and be open to what God is saying here through his Word. Are we being uplifting in our conversations? Are we edifying that person in any way by sharing something negative about them with someone else?

My Bright Lights book gave some examples also on very subtle ways of gossip. I thought I'd share some to give you an idea....

"Keep Jill in your prayers. I haven't seen her at church or Bright Lights in several weeks and last time I saw her she was with a friend who had a nose ring"

"Why do you think Debbie treats people so rudely?"

"I don't mean to say anything against Elizabeth, but have you noticed how she has been dressing recently?"

"I'm really concerned about Lucy. I heard that she spends over an hour in the morning doing her hair and make-up. She is really being influenced by those new girls down the street."

The last thing I just wanted to mention is the difference between slander and gossip. Something that I didn't realize. Slander is when we are purposely trying to damage the reptuation of someone else, often by telling lies about them. (This is what I thought gossip entailed too) But really Gossip is sharing information that is true, or at least that we believe to be true. Gossip could be told without wrong motives but simply because we like sharing stories..but this is NOT right. :(

Proverbs 22:1 "A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches"

Eccleciastes 7:1 "A good name is better than precious ointment"

Nobody wants to be talked badly about and God has really shown me today the areas that I need to work on and I've experienced the pain of being gossiped about and it is no fun. We all know that, so I'm challenging all of you girls to examine your lives...can others look at us and call us Gossips? Talebearers? Whisperers? Slanderers? Tattlers?

Let's try to stop Gossip all together. Think about each word before we say it and if it doesn't bring glory to God or uplift anyone, let's just not say it. And if someone comes to you to share gossip, quickly but nicely put it to them that you don't want to be involved in the conversation. And pray...pray that we all can live our lives without gossip and slander. That we can grow to be more like Christ each day!

Dear Mom...

2010-01-05T00:01:00.000-06:00

A video I put together for today. It explains it all...

Hold My Heart

2009-11-10T19:39:00.003-06:00

Recently I heard this song by Tenth Avenue North called "Hold My Heart" It's becoming one of my favorites I think! Thought I'd just share the lyrics with you.....

How long must I pray, must I pray to You?
How long must I wait, must I wait for You?
How long till I see your face, see You shining through?
I'm on my knees, begging You to notice me.
I'm on my knees, Father will you turn to me?

One tear in the driving rain,
One voice in a sea of pain
Could the maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breaking heart?
One light, that's all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say you are
Wont You come close and hold my heart

I've been so afraid, afraid to close my eyes
So much can slip away before I say goodbye
But if there's no other way, I'm done asking why.
Cause I'm on my knees, begging You to turn to Me
I'm on my knees, Father will You run to me?

So many questions without answer, your promises remain
I can't sleep but I'll take my chances to hear You call my name
To hear you call my name.

Hold my heart, could you hold my heart?
Hold my heart.

The second verse in this song seems so real to me. Afraid to close my eyes, because soon it could slip away. For awhile after my Mom died, it was even hard for me to truly love someone because I was afraid God would just take them. I can't live with that fear though... He's holding my heart! <3

Nothingness...

2009-10-30T17:18:00.003-05:00

It's been forever since I've blogged, hasn't it? Since I've moved to IL it's seemed weird to keep a blog though. For various reasons actually....since I have time now and want to write though, I figured I'd update you here! :)

Life has slowed down a lot since canning season. The younger ones have started school again and Jordan is working a lot of hours for a farmer, but as for me I'm kind of just existing. I work part time for a couple near us but other than that I try to help out around home. I don't do that much though, so there is a LOT of room for improvement! I think I have to change my mindset though because right now it's hard for me to get involved with the school work for the kids and to try to be creative to do things with the younger ones. Pray for me! :) I almost feel like right now that I'm "stuck" (that sounds bad, but I don't mean like stuck here or anything..i love it here) what I mean is that I feel like there should be a greater purpose in life for me than what I am doing now. And yes, that is my own fault, cause obviously I am not doing it, but I need guidance. Awhile ago Mom bought me a Bright Lights group study so that I could be preparing to start my own group. I've about read through all the material but at the same time I feel inadequate to even lead one and then my faith must be so small cause it's hard for me to believe God will bring anyone. :( Once again, please be praying!

Oh well, while I'm thinking of it, I thought I'd post a link to a video I watched a few weeks ago. Most of you have probably already seen it, but my family and I thought it was incredible! THE BUTTERFLY CIRCUS . I have to remember God has each of our lives in His hand and it's a journey and he's turning us all into something beautiful! :) He has a plan AND a purpose!

In the last two weeks I was working on another song too. There was a stretch of about 2 days that I was struggling with missing my Mom in Heaven. For some reason writing helps me a lot when I get like that. So I wrote..but this time tried to write it from a perspective of someone hurting, but not just ME hurting. Anyone who has gone through something hard. When writing a few people came to mind. Friends who have had cancer affect their life somehow, a friend I knew who was in a serious car wreck, and those who have had young children taken from them. ALL of them hurt and I'm sure ask similar questions I ask. After finishing the song though someone asked me why I write just "sad" songs. It really offended me at first but I think the thing is we write what we know. And me being who I am, I write when I'm sad and so with that combination, sad songs come about! :) Do you all think there is something wrong with writing about pain and hurting though? I'm not negative in it....well, I'll let you be the judge. Here's the chorus to the song.

"I still hurt, I still cry...All of this time and I still don't know why
It's still real, life just goes on...But God is the healer of my life and those that are gone"

When writing this song I wanted to show that even though you are a Christian and the one who was taken was a Christian, it's still difficult losing them. But we do have an anchor holding us and to comfort us. There is hope!

Well I'm kind of just rambling on and on I guess. I have a few events in the upcoming few months that I'm pretty excited about. My sister is about to have her baby, any day now so I can't wait for that and then my other sister from MO is coming up here for Thanksgiving so that will be really great. I'm looking forward to having her see into my life up here a little bit! :) And then in December a dear friend of mine is getting married back in MO, so my family here will be traveling back for that! I can't wait!!!! So a lot of fun and exciting things planned!

Hope you all have been having a great fall! Oh and check out my other blog for some pictures from a recent hike we had at the Nachusa Grasslands! :)

oh btw...the pic at the top is of me and my friend Anna. We met this summer and she's been a great friend. My family has really been enjoying getting together with theirs! :) Just figured I should explain the random pic I posted! ;)

Walk Down Memory Lane

2009-09-12T19:35:00.009-05:00

Last month I took a week trip down to Missouri to celebrate my birthday with my family there. I had a great time with them and they had a neat idea planned for me for my 21st birthday. Tara, Mandy and Joan sat down ahead of time and tried to think of lots of places that were important to me growing up, or that had funny memories tied to them. As most people know I have about the WORST memory so some of these places took refreshers for me so I could remember where I was at! :D (not too many though) Very sadly though, almost all the places have either been knocked down or have changed companies, so if you see me outside a "Bed, Bath, and Beyond" don't think it's just a great store to me...it didn't USED to be that! ;) I'll explain under each picture though! :) Hope you enjoy this little peak into my past though!

Tara's house! Lot's of my time was spent here before moving up here

This little cabin/shed thing was on the property I lived on from the time I was 15 to when I moved to my Dads. It was an ugly old shed though, and we completely redid it! This holds a lot of memories though! We would all work on this as a family each night, and this was where we saw the first signs of my Mom not talking right and knew something was wrong. We had ideas for a long time after she died calling it "Peri's Playhouse" and having it as a store selling canned things we made and quilts and stuff

Me and my dog, Macy!!!! Greatest dog, left her in MO though!

This is my Dad's house where I lived for about a year a half...that's Lane with me!

The mall! ;) Spent too much time here growing up!

This is the paint store my Dad has been doing business with for EVER! At least as long as I've been alive! :) We used to go up quite often to see everyone and Mandy and I would always look through all the wallpaper books. lol

Mid Rivers Christian Church. This was the church I went to for most of my 'younger' life. Did TONS of plays and things here, guess this is where I first started acting. ;) This was a big time memory for Tara too!

LOL, the library! This is more of a joke place. I did go to the library quite often, but I think it made the top 21 places because I never could find my way there. It was only a mile from my house, but I am directionally challenged and well, it was just hard for me to get to! :)

Gou-Jon Academy of Dance...I spent most of my life here. :) As you can see it's currently nothing right now. My dance teacher passed away and they closed down, but I spent 6 days out of the week here for many MANY years.

Pundman Ford! Not sure why we always had to go to this Ford dealership, but we did. Every vehicle we bought I think came from here, except our little bug! They always gave out free popcorn here! :)

The sign says JJ's but when I was younger it was known as "The Roadhouse" Think I only ate there once but my Mom liked this place and Mandy and Tara seemed to remember it a ton! I don't remember liking it very much though! :)

Dance Techniques West...my first dance studio. I was not even 2 years old starting dance here. It has also closed down, but I have fond memories from that studio! :) I was young when I left though, 8 or so.

Can't explain this picture too much, but I came here quite a bit with my Mom when I was a lot younger. Holds quite a few memories. And right on the other side of this building was a VERY CREEPY cemetery, that always scared Mandy and me!

This was Phar-Mor (could be spelled wrong) I was young when it changed but I have one distinct memory from here...! I was 4 and my brother was pretending to play "beauty shop" with me at home before leaving and I told him not to really cut it and he said okay, but as we are walking into this store, my Mom noticed that a chunk of my hair had been cut out right in the back, my hair had been really long and he cut it quite short! Let's just say she was NOT happy with Kyle, but was able to hide the missing piece of hair! :)

The house I grew up in! :)

Our mailbox! :)

My neighbor's house. Clark and Kathleen Meyers and they had 3 girls that we'd play with all the time! :) Kathleen babysat us sometimes too! :)

THEN......and NOW! This picture was taken at City Hall in St. Peters. We'd go there all the time to get pics taken! Joan and my Mom would get us all dressed up and then just taken us to the park here and get pictures! The first one was taken in the same park when I was around 5 or so.

Chad Theatrical...this was where we bought our dance shoes and leotards and stuff! :)

Can't forget this place! :) Fritz's Frozen Custard! Our favorite place to go for ice cream..and we went OFTEN! :)

I've got a lot more pictures from the park that I'll probably post tomorrow! It'll just be a separate post though for the pictures. :) Hope you enjoyed the walk! ;) Oh, and I didn't take all the pictures, Joan had her camera, so she has more of the 21 places! :)

SMILE

2009-09-12T17:08:00.002-05:00

Today I was doing my most favorite thing...canning....YEA RIGHT! :D Let's just say that canning is NOT on my list of "likes" but it's something that has to be done and I need to learn to like it. So, yea...I'm still working on that! ;) I had a pretty bad attitutude about it earlier today though and finally had to just change my thinking and it became fun today working with Mom making the salsa and cutting up the tomatoes and peppers. God gave me a little "smile" today too, so that 'kept me goin' :) Isn't God GOOD! :)

(Just so you know, I did NOT do anything to this pepper...this is how it looked when I opened it up! That'd cheer anyone up, right? :) Thanks God!)

My Princess Party!

2009-08-26T19:42:00.009-05:00

I can't begin to tell you what an amazing day I had yesterday! :) My family definitely gave me the "royal" treatment! :) On Monday they made me go to bed by 11:00 telling me that even princesses have bedtimes! ;) I had no idea they were going to stay up and DECORATE! :) Tuesday morning was perfect though. They had me close my eyes as I came down the stairs to find the prettiest dining room ever! :) They had used pink sheer fabric around the windows and doors with white lights in it to make a very "pretty" soft look to it.

There were flower petals all over the floor and heart swirly things from the ceiling fan. Floating candles in a clear bowl with pink water and sparkley confetti stuff on the table! Just PERFECT! Mom did an amazing job sewing all the dresses and outfits for the boys! She really outdid herself on this! I am definitely not worth all that she did for me to make my day extra special! We had a fun time getting ready for the party and then around 1:30 or so we started it! :)

(The head piece is NOT part of the outfit!)

(Honored guest...Esau...lol)

(Dad and Me)

(The girls with Dad)

Mom with the help of Gabrielle and Jess I think made a delicious mexican meal! (my favorite!) Dad had to leave quick after eating for work so we did gifts real quick right there! :) Some were uh...umm...quite embarrassing! (Some pics I just CANT post) They were funny though, and well...I think it was JAMIE'S idea! :D My family got me very nice things though and one in particular was a scrapbook for the party. Mom got all different stickers and things for it! So we got quite a few pictures to fill the book! :) Oh, and Mom made me a shirt! I thought she had bought it cause it looked SO good, but she didnt! It's perfect though! ;)(Can anyone guess who I got this from?..JESS AND JAMIE)

(the gift....ahh!)

After gifts we had a "funny" time dancing! :D None of us really know what we are doing when it comes to that, but we tried anyway! :D Christian was somewhat willing to learn but Jordan just liked to twirl me around as fast as he could and get me SO dizzy! Mom was even getting into it! ;)

(Mom, Me and Gabrielle)

So after dancing we had cake, oooooh So good! Mom made a heart shaped cake but it was chocolate with reeses peanut butter cups in it!!! DELICIOUS!!! :)

After eating we took some cake to our neighbors, Dale and Addie. Addie is very sick but I had promised her that we'd go over in our outfits to show her. I'm not even sure she remembered me, but she definitely knows Mom, so it was a treat I think for her to see everyone so dressed up...or those who STAYED in their outfits! :P We had decided that it'd only be fitting to watch a princess movie that night so ALL dressed up we went to the movie store in town to pick out one! :D We got quite the looks but the girl there was really nice to us, maybe she thought we were royalty! Jordan was too embarrassed of us though, so he stayed in the van. :D

(This was at night...it looked SO pretty!)

When we got home I changed out of my dress and got to do what I love most, well almost most...RIDING! :) Jordan took Gabrielle and I riding for a couple hours. I'm seriously thinking it's my new favorite thing to do! Can't even describe how much I love galloping through the farmers field, seems like the whole world is disappearing and its just me and my horse! :) LOVE IT! :)

Anyway....on to the party! :) We finished the night by watching "Princess Protection Program" Surprisingly it was pretty good! :) If my family reads this...Thanks SO much for the wonderful birthday! :) And for treating me like a princess! :) Love you all!(This is Mom's great grandma's necklace that she let me wear)

August 14th...

2009-08-11T23:09:00.004-05:00

This is one date that I hate very much. This was the date that marked the beginning of my changed life. Never again on this earth would my Mom live with NO cancer and who would have known that only 5 short months later she wouldn't even be with me any longer.

I'm trying really hard to not dwell on all of this because it seems foolish. My Mom is in Heaven and I have a wonderful loving family here with me, why be sad? But it doesn't work...I still get sad, I still miss her a LOT, and there are still even parts of me that long for her to be back. Just to be with her one more time.

I went back and reread the blog post I did last year at this time and it seems crazy to me even how much life has changed in this one year. The past 6 months life has been incredible. I love it! I have that same joy that I had when my Mom was alive. Okay, maybe not exactly the same because that hole is still somewhat there. How could it ever fully go away, but my heart HAS been restored to an extent and I'm so thankful to God that He has blessed me with some family that does love me unconditionally. It's like my Mom can't be here for me, but God's allowed someone else to come and fill that spot and I know my Mom would be so happy.

If any of you are interested in reading the other blog post I'll post the link to where I blogged at. It explains more of what I went through on this day. The pain and heartache and why I hate the 14th of August so much. Old blog post

Please be praying for me that I can look to the Lord tomorrow as I go through this day. That I'd look at all the blessings God has given me instead of the tremendous loss.

I miss you Mom and I'll never forget you! I'll love you forever! ;(

LUKE IS ONE!

2009-08-07T20:58:00.003-05:00

Today is my baby brother's first birthday! :) I know I don't usually post too much on siblings birthdays but it being his first I thought I'd at least update you all with a few photos. :) Luke has been such a blessing to everyone in the family. What a little bundle of joy he is. It's hard to believe he is one, but at the same time it seems like it's been FOREVER since we were at the hospital with him being born. I guess just so much has happened since then! :) I'm so thankful to God though he gave me Luke to be my brother. I just love him so much! Love you Luke!

Country Princess

2009-07-31T19:00:00.002-05:00

Well, since it's taking me forever to get together a post of my OK trip I figured I'd blog about this first! :) Kind of has to do with OK, so it'll work. My friend Bethany has been going through her registration papers for her goats and needed to name them all, well to my surprise she named one after me! How sweet huh? She named this little goat, "Country Princess" I guess she saw that my Mom called me that a few times so she liked the name and used it! :) Thought I'd post some pictures of her too though, since it's the first goat that Bethany is keeping that she's named after me!! :D Exciting, huh? :)

HaPpY BiRtHdAy MoM!

2009-07-21T06:00:00.007-05:00

Today is no ordinary day...but it's my new Mom's birthday! Although it's only been 6 months since I've lived here, there are already so many qualities about Mom I love and look up to. Most importantly is her ability to love anyone and everyone. I wouldn't be here today if she didn't have the heart she does. How many people do you know take in 20 year olds? Also Mom is about the most organized person I know. Some of us kids about drive her crazy with our lack of organization.....not ME of course!! ;) :D (ya right!)

She rises very early and is the last to sleep at night just so she has everything caught up for the day, Whether it's dishes, laundry, or school stuff. Mom also has such a generous heart and is a servant to so many. The way she so diligently serves her family is such an example to me. I know it'll be hard shoes to fill when I have the chance to be a Mom to a family but I hope I can have the servants heart she has. I could go on and on and say how talented, creative, honest/blunt ;), forgiving, and fun person she is but almost all of you already know that all! So Happy Birthday Mom and thanks so much for choosing to be my Mom!!!!

...This passage SO describes Mom, but I'm adding things in parenthesis to further explain it and to apply to her!... ;)

"Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. (He has no lack of anything with her!) She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax (maybe more like cotton fabrics and grain..is flax a grain), and willingly works with her hands. She is like the merchant ships, she brings her food from afar. (We have a garden at Jaspers, so that's kinda far!) She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household, and a portion for her maidservants. (See...this is Mom completely! We don't have servants, but she gives food to the neighbors each day!) She considers a field and buys it (Or our neighbors house...lol), from her profits she plants a vineyard.(Guess what...the house she wants HAS a vineyard) She girds herself with strength and strengthens her arms.(She has to be strong to pick me up to tickle me!) She perceives that her merchandise is good and her lamp does not go out by night. She stretches out her hands to the distaff and her hand holds the spindle. She extends her hand to the poor, yes she reaches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet. (I'm so glad she doesn't really have us in scarlet all the time but we do stay warm) She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land. (Dad's pretty well known I guess!) ;) She makes linen garments and sells them; and supplies sashes for the merchants. Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: "Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all." Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. (Mom you are so beautiful on the inside AND out!) Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates."
Proverbs 31:10-31 (with added stuff)

Love you!!!

Your Country Princess, Danielle ;)

Lincoln Park Zoo

2009-07-06T22:57:00.004-05:00

Well since it's this late I'm not really going to write alot but just share some pictures with you all! When I flew back into Chicago my family was there to pick me up and had such a fun day planned for us! :) We went to the Lincoln Park Zoo. What a shock it was to go from 100 degree weather to 60 degree weather though!! Brrr!!! Not sure IL EVER gets hot!!! :D We had such a wonderful time though! I loved just spending time with my family and getting to see them all again! Love you guys!

(Chicago)

(Gabrielle and Isaac)

(Dad...love you!)

(Standing in line for the carousel...notice the sweatshirt?)

The Joy of Work

2009-07-06T17:12:00.005-05:00

Well as most of you know I am back from OK now and I had a wonderful trip, but have no pictures to post right now. I'm waiting on pictures from Anna so I can do one nice looonnngg post! :) But in the meantime, I thought I'd share this with you! :) Today marks the beginning of something new for me!!!! YAY! :) I got a blister which will turn into a callous soon, right below my middle finger from WORKING!! :) I've had callouses many times but from other kinds of things like playing guitar or sometimes raking, but never from just general work. I've made comments lots of times before about Jordan's hands because he has them on both hands. I had asked how he got them, thinking there would be some sort of thing he had done and they all just say..."work!" So, I'm here to say today I got my first one from WORKING with Jordan! :) I at least know what it's from though, trimming, trimming, and more trimming! :) (Actually I didn't do that much at all, but I guess my hands aren't used to it) I had fun though and am happy that Jordan is patient enough to teach me how to help him with his jobs. And I'm thrilled I will have a callous!!!!! :) It's hard to see it in the picture, but that's the best I could get! :)

Thank you Jordan for giving me this opportunity!! :) Thanks for letting me help you also!

"And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;" Colossians 3:23

KITTENS!!

2009-06-18T13:09:00.005-05:00

Well it's a rainy day today and I really have so much to get done but I wanted to get this blog post in before I leave on my trip. :) Last week while at Addie's house (the neighbor I help) I noticed there were 6 kittens! They all looked so cute so after I was done working, some of us kids went back over to play with them and get some pictures!! Immediately Gabrielle, Isaac and I clamed which ones were ours. :) There were actually two sets of kittens. The white ones and then the tiger looking ones and the grey one. (We claimed those ones) I had the smallest tiger looking one and her name was Whiskers, and Isaac named his Buttons and then I don't know if Gab named hers. She got the ugly looking one because his eyes were all glued shut sort of. :( She doctored him up though and I think he's looking more normal! I'm glad I got the pictures when I did though because Addie's daughter took home the 3 white ones since the Mom wasn't around. They were so so cute! I got a few pictures though, so hope you enjoy! I'm not even an animal person and especially a CAT person, but these kittens were adorable!!!!

(Does it look like I'm squishing her?)(Isaac and Buttons)
(Gabrielle and Mr. Gross Eyes)(This is Whiskers...she was SO cute and relaxed, the only kitten to lay on it's back)

(Yours truly...Whiskers!)

_________________________________________________________________

So anyway....tonight is my last night here for awhile. I leave for MO tomorrow and will be there until Tuesday. Then from there I will fly to OK to visit my friends! :) Bethany will be turning 20 so I get to go and celebrate with her! She's having a beach party so that should be TONS of fun!!!! :) I'm having fun just preparing for it! ;)

It sure will seem weird being gone from everyone. But I think they are ready for the break! I am looking forward to seeing my sisters and friends though too! :) I'm sure I'll have lots to blog about when I get back home.

Family Vacation!!!!

2009-06-09T14:07:00.013-05:00

Okay, don't be too mad at me! It's been forever since I blogged but what can I say? I have a life now! ;) I really should try to update more because we do a lot and there are tons of pics I could post but haven't, so I'm sorry!This trip we just went on was definitely worth blogging though! :) Awhile ago Jess and Jamie had the idea for us to take a family trip to the sand dunes in Michigan and camp. I'll be honest the thought of going to MI to camp and hike did not sound fun to me, but I wasn't going to tell them that! ;) Plus with all the comments about not doing things with the family I had to just be a trooper with this one. :DAs soon as we got there though my opinion of the whole trip changed SOOO much! The sand dunes were AMAZING! :) We first got there and set up our tents and got some things organized then it was time to check out the BIIIIGGG hill! ;) It was like right next to our camp site so that was nice but boy was that a climb! The hill was huge and since we were all just getting over colds it wasn't the easist climb! But like Aunti Dar's cell phone thing...once we made the climb it was worth the view! How gorgeous! :) We were way way over the tree line and could see Lake Michigan from where we were at and just everything! I was pretty much in awe at first at all that God had created...truly amazing! :)

Due to no cell phone service down at the campsite I had to make some calls while at the top of the hill too! :) Txted some pictures to people and then called my sister to tell her about it! :) What can I say...I was excited, okay? :)Since it was later by the time we got up there we only hiked a little bit but it was sooo fun! It was like we were playing in a huge sandbox. We took off our flip flops and just ran barefoot! The only downfall was having sand EVERYWHERE...not the best feeling! :D

(Okay, I look REALLY weird, but like I said...sand EVERYWHERE)

So we went back down that huge hill and had dinner, chili on fritos! Jamie had the idea to make them and they were soo yummy! It was a cool idea also, just pour the chili right in the bag of fritos. They also made these really neat "pudgie pies" (not sure if I am spelling that right) I didn't have one the first night but got braver the second night. They put lemon pie filling and marshmellows in them as a dessert...yuuummm! So good! :)

(This little critter was a a frequent visitor, but at the time of the picture he was getting into our neighbor's trash! ;)

The second day was the best! We got an early start, kind of, and hiked back up the HUGE hill and hiked over to the beach!!! We decided to leave our flip flops at the tent and go barefoot the whole way which was smart, except for the walk home. At first the water was soo cold but by the time we got so numb it felt pretty good! :) Gabrielle and I were determined to swim out to the water marker thingy and we thought for sure it'd be pretty deep out there, but as we started to swim it got deeper and deeper than shallow, so it fooled us! :D It was quite cold though! :)

The kids had fun burying eachother in the sand and making Sand Mermen. :) I think it was a fun day for everyone! :) The guys brought the frisbee too, so I saw that flying around a lot and lots of rock skipping. When it was time to go home the sand was VERY hot so we knew we wouldn't make it going home that way! We ended up taking some wooded kind of path and then the roads so although it wasn't hot on our feet it still didn't feel the best and it was one long walk! :) We must have got a lot more leg muscle after this trip. :D I can't say it enough though, it was SO SO SO much fun!

That night the sunset was SOO pretty so a few of us hiked back up and sat on top of one of the dunes and watched the sunset over the lake. I figured it's the perfect spot for a proposal one day! :D So the only bad thing from that day was the sunburns...we didn't REALIZE we were getting as much sun as we were and well...we are paying for it now. :( Poor Jess has the reddest legs I've ever seen and many of us had some red faces. My back was the main thing that hurt but thanks to God it is feeling better today!

(Isaac picked these flowers for me, RIGHT after we talked about proposals...isn't he SO sweet?)

On our way home we stopped in St. Joseph's Harbor. What a change in weather though because we were in like pants and sweatshirts, it was chilly! It was totally worth the 5 dollars though to see the light house down there! ;) We also got to do some shopping which is always fun! :) Thanks for the WONDERFUL trip, it was great!Also, it was just nice to spend time away from everything with family where there really aren't too many distractions. :)

Mother's Day This Year

2009-05-11T14:15:00.002-05:00

What a strange mix of emotions I had yesterday as we were celebrating Mother's Day. I had this tremendous joy just to finally have a Mom again but at the same time missing my Mom and wondering how she'd feel about everything. I know though that if my Mom had the choice she would want me right where I am at now. She would love Dawn and the rest of the family and would for sure want me there.

So we had a nice time at church and all the guys and Dad's did all the cooking, which was sweet. We had hamburgers and hotdogs and then everything to go with that. Afterwards a bunch of us played kickball....man, that was SOOOO much fun! I don't think I had played since 5th grade, but it was a blast! Thanks to Rachel though, because I wouldn't have even been able to play in the dress I had on so she gave me some extra clothes!!!! :) My shoulder is still a little sore from my sliding into third base, but hey, it was worth it! (I learned AFTER the slide that you should never slide diving head first into the plate) :D

After kickball it was time to leave and their cousins came over. :) We had another cook out with them and just hung out. It was a very fun day and we did get some pictures so when I get back to the house I'll upload them. (I'm at the neighbors) :)

Well I hope you all had a very Happy Mother's Day! :)

HaPpY BiRtHdAy MaNdY!

2009-04-20T00:06:00.000-05:00

Happy Birth...Day To You..to you! Happy Birth...Day To You...tooo yoooouuu! Happy Birth...Day...Dear........Maaaaaaannnnnnnnddddddyyyyyy
....1, 2, 3, Happy Birth...Day To You...Happy Birthday! ;) Well this will be the very first birthday I have not spent with Mandy. I'll be honest it feels VERY weird not being with her on her birthday but she knows that I am thinking of her ALL day and praying for her as the day goes on. We were txting last night back and forth and she let me know that she was just having a hard time with this birthday. Not that I am some important person in her life, but not only is she missing my Mom this birthday but I am not there either. It was weird, because last night I was struggling too with just missing my Mom and feeling strange that I wouldn't be there for Mandy's birthday. I got to thinking of my life growing up and how much that Mandy and I did together. I think when we were younger we were about inseperable. BEST BUDS! I know that doesn't always last, we grow up and change but Mandy I want you to know that no matter WHAT happens, if I move to Alaska and your in Hawaii or if you change to be a completely different person, I will ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS love you, not matter what!
I'm so thankful for the love God has shown me and that I can love you and my other family with this unconditional love.

So, Mandy even though I can't be there with you today, pretend I am, and that I'm celebrating right along with you. And look at these pictures no matter if we are 2, 8, 12, 19, 21....we will always be close and best friends! I love you so much Mandy!Happy Birthday!
(Did you catch the tune to the b-day song at the beginning?) ;)

Just a little of everything!

2009-04-19T16:07:00.005-05:00

It's been forever since I've written and a lot has happened. Since I can't remember everything though I'm going to keep this short and just tell about the last few days I guess. :) Well wait, first for some updates. Thanks for all the prayers for my grandparents. My Grandma is at the nursing home now and doing very well. My sisters go and see her at least once a week and I think there are others there that she can interact with. I'm so thankful to God that her spirits are staying up and she is recovering so well! What an answer to prayers that is. Thanks to Hannah also for sending her a card! She absolutely LOVED it! She was touched and so was my sister Tara to see you had written to her! :) Thanks for being such a blessing to her! :) My other grandma, Grandma Moody, is doing well also! Praise God! I talked to her the day before Easter and she was feeling great! She had one chemo treatment so far and said that she wasn't sick at all and was feeling good. They told her after her second treatment would be when she would lose her hair, so it hasn't come to that yet, but I think she may take it okay. I let her know that so so many people were praying for her and she said to tell everyone Thanks! :)

While thanking God for the healing and recovery of my Grandmas I am sad to say that Tom, my friend who I had mentioned with cancer, went home to be with the Lord. :( I put a sad face, but in reality, this isn't a sad thing. He's at home now and in no more pain. I had no idea how tough it would be for me hearing the news of his passing, but I didn't take it easy. I think for multiple reasons it was hard, one being this was the first funeral and death of someone I knew since my Mom's. To most of you that wont make sense because what does Tom's death have to do with my Mom's and I guess I really have no answer to that, but i DO know that it brings up lots of memories and I just feel like I get to go through all the grieving again....not fun! All of my family was so sweet though to make a way for me to be able to get back to MO to be there for the funeral. So, on Tuesday, Jess, Jamie, Jordan and I packed up and left! We made it in time for the visitation and then went to the funeral the next day. Besides Jamie getting the flu and throwing up the whole way home the trip was nice. :P (Sorry Jamie you got so sick!) :(

I had a great time on Wednesday going to Mama Lee's house! Jess and Jamie took me with them to her house. We went to help her clean a few things, but I think I did more talking and looking through magazines then I did clean! :D Jess and I enjoyed looking through the ads and finding places for Jamie to take us too! ;) Thanks Jessica and Jamie for letting me tag along for the day!

For the last few days here the weather has been GORGEOUS so we were able to work outside and get some things done. Thursday was fun powerwashing one of the barns and getting it ready to be painted. Then on Friday we spent like ALL day outside!! I LOVED IT! We started with scraping paint from the side we powerwashed and then got our paint brushes ready for work! ;) I think there were like 7 of us painting at one time! Needless to say, we got it done very quickly! So now, one side of the barn is looking VERY nice! For those of you who are wondering, we are not painting the BIG barn, just the one that looks similar to a garage. :) After painting though we went to the park to hike. Well, I had no idea how tiring hiking could be! And I think I was a bit confused what I was getting myself into. :P I wore my flip flops and we went on like a THREE hour hike! My foot kills me now! We also had to hike through some creek thing with freezing water, I think I proved to the group I am a woosey! Tennis Shoes for SURE next time! ;) What a fun time though we had all hiking together out there! :)

Yesterday us girls spent most of the day going to garage sales and rummage sales! Unfortunately the night before I had tried riding one of the horses and well, didn't realize I was so allergic to horses, so I still had some effects from that on Saturday. One of my eyes was QUITE puffy so I wore sunglasses into most of the dark buildings we went into to cover up my eye. I think I might have drawed more attention to myself wearing sunglasses indoors than I would have with my eye. We found some clothes though and Mom and Dad bought me lots more cherry stuff for my one day, hopefully soon, gonna be kitchen! :D I love the stuff!! Ice cream dishes, plates, a pitcher and this adorable CHERRIES sign! :)
Today was Gabrielle's piano recital. I had a lot of fun, I've never been to one before so it was pretty neat! :) She did an EXCELLENT job and so did the other students who played. It was neat to see the other girls I know playing also! :) Good job Kalebaugh girls!!!! Faith, who is the teacher, did an excellent job as well! :) I did take pictures but since I'm in a hurry to get this up because I need to call my friend BESH, I didn't edit the pics, sorry :(

Becky and FaithCrystal

Gabrielle and Faith

Rachel and Faith

Jordan, doesn't he look like he's having fun? ;)

Kaleb and Jessica...aren't they cute! ;)

Isaac...adorable!

I've been thinking about my Mom a whole lot the last 2 days. Yesterday especially, I guess since I was in a groggy kind of mood anyway, I don't know, but then when we passed a street called Peri Dr. that was VERY weird for me. Never in my life had I seen someone with that name and especially a street named that. I'm glad God does little things like that though for me. Today Pastor John was speaking about the passage from Luke chapter 20 and how Mary was weeping at the empty tomb, not realizing Jesus had rose from the dead. He then started to compare that with James, where we are to take joy in our trials and knowing God works all things for our good, he asked us how many of us were crying next to empty tombs. It made me think a lot about my own situation and with my Mom's death. I cried a LOT and was angry with God. That went on for a long time actually, confused as to if God even could love me. With all the things that were happening in my life it felt like it wasn't possible. I WAS crying next to an empty tomb....God knew what I had to go through and knew what I could handle. And I had to go through all of that to end up where I am right now. And He isn't finished with me yet, just right now though I am having more and more peace with my Mom's death. Don't get me wrong, I am not HAPPY one bit with what happened, but I realize that God had to take my Mom to teach me a lot of things and for me to meet the Lees and for them to become part of my family. What a blessing that has come from my Mom's death, a whole lot more family! As I sit here and think about what I just have written I feel like most of you will think I'm so cruel that I could be saying that....and I'm wondering the same thing. I don't mean that I want my Mom dead, or that I'm content with what God decided..I'm not, but I AM thankful that I am seeing good come from it. More than just good, God knew my heart and knew what I needed and has given it to me. And I'm thankful to Him for that. And I know that my Mom is in Heaven with him also rejoicing witht he decision God has made, to place me with such a wonderful family! ;( ;( Thank you God!

Prayer Updates

2009-04-01T13:28:00.003-05:00

Thank you to all of those who have been praying for my Grandma. I've gotten two emails this past week giving updates on her and they've been quite encouraging. The first one mentioned that she was out of ICU and getting physical therapy in her normal room. They did have her ankles tied to the bed though so that she wouldn't move her hip. :( Sounded mean but it was necessary. She was in a lot of pain too and still is but I think she is in better spirits now. The email I got today said that she was going to be moved to the care facility soon, (like tomorrow maybe) which is good. From the email it sounds like she is okay with this decision. Her doctor will be there regularly to see her and then nurses there 24/7. There are many people from her church that have been visiting which has been a tremendous blessing. I'm still praying a lot for her but thanking God so much for healing her this much already. I was thinking too....if any of you have extra time or would like to make a little card or send a note, she would love that! I know it seems weird, because none of you know her, but she'd be so encouraged by that. Even if you just sent her some scriptures that'd be great! :) Just let me know if you'd want to do that.

As for other news....the thing that I couldn't share before I can now. :( While I was in MO, I found out that my other Grandma, Grandma Moody, has cancer. :( What a shock that was finding out. She's never been sick, never been in the hospital and well....she's the last person I would have expected. When I found out I had to pretend I didn't know, she wasn't telling anyone and then my sister didn't even know, so that's why I couldn't post it. Please PLEASE be praying for her though. She starts treatments tomorrow (Thursday) for the cancer. From what I hear she has lymphoma, but there is also cancer on her lung and in her neck. :( The doctors are saying it's treatable but as soon as I hear the word 'cancer' it means death to me. God can do anything though, and if it's his will He can heal her also, and I just have to remember that. :( Also with hearing this news not only was I devastated because she has this awful disease, but it brought back so many memories. My Grandma is the closest one to me besides my Mom that has been diagnosed. Please pray for her health and for her soul.

As for updates here....I've just been editing it seems like. I came home with 6000 pictures to edit and boy does that take a LONG time. I've posted some pictures from one of the photoshoots I was on if you want to check those out, they are on the photo blog I have. Yesterday I worked a lot more on wedding pictures but they get tiring. :( Also my neck and shoulder and back started hurting pretty bad. We are guessing it's from all the computer work I'm doing, so I've tried to take a break from that. :) It IS my job though, so I need to get them done.

Kaleb's birthday was Monday, so we had fun celebrating that Mon and Tuesday. Jess and Jamie were here the past two days also which was a lot of fun. Jordan and Jamie were building the new chicken coop, it looks SOO good. I'm sure they will be posting pics on their blog soon! :) They did a very nice job though...I'm going to hire them to build my house someday I think! ;)

Well just got done with bible time and am thinking of baking something so I better get going..just wanted to update you all. :)

Thank you again for all of the prayers! :)

Life in General...

2009-03-24T17:54:00.002-05:00

Well I am still in Missouri until this coming Friday. I had only planned on a week here but after many talks with Tara she convinced me to stay for the full 2 weeks. It's just so hard for me because after 20 min. gone from home I was wanting to be back so badly and missing them. Call me weird, but it's true! So 2 weeks has felt like forever....I'm really excited to get back on Friday. :)

Don't get me wrong though, I love my family here and have enjoyed some of the time here. This week I am actually staying at Tara's house. She is on spring break so it's nice to spend lots of time with her. Today we went to lunch and shopping some, so that was fun! I think I'm spending way too much money though! :( Although, I'm set for summer now as far as clothes go! :)

So anyway, the trip has been pretty good, spent time with the Hunt Family, photographed a wedding, did a photoshoot for a very lovely family, painted Tara's room and bathroom, helped powerwash a house with my Dad and umm..shopped I guess! :)

It seems like for all weeks to come home these were the most crucial. In a way it's been a "sobering" trip. :( I had told you all about my Grandma who was in the hospital, well so far it seems like it's all going well. We are going back up to see her tomorrow. She had her hip surgery yesterday I think. So Praise God for that, I'm pretty sure she did well through that. Well, also while I was down here I went to visit a friend of mine, Tom. He has had cancer since 2007 and is in his final stages right now. :( He called me at the end of January to tell me goodbye and I just couldn't handle that. So I've been praying that God would keep him alive until I could come back and see him myself. So I got back here and thought of Tom everyday but was scared of what I might see. Not sure I could handle it. :( I talked to Sage and told her how I had prayed and she told me that I just had to go see him, especially after praying that way. God answered my prayer and kept him alive, why wouldn't I go see him? :( So....I called up the Hunts and they went with me. Boy, was that ever hard. I think I said maybe 5 words to him. I just couldn't stop crying when I saw him. He's gotten So incredibly thin that it scared me, I didn't recognize him at all. He was in so much pain also. His testimony was amazing though. As sick as he was and as much pain as he is in he said that his goal was to just get as many people to Heaven him before he died. Then he explained that he couldn't be mad at God, because God is the giver of life and it's His to take away too. Who says we deserve 80 years? I hope that I can be like Tom when my time comes and I hope I can be an example to so many like he is. Please be praying for Tom also. He is only 28 years old and battling this. Last I heard also he fell when trying to get up and his his spine where the epidural was so it's caused lots more pain. :(

On top of all of this, I found out my stepdad has cancer again and then someone very VERY dear to me has it to. I would never imagine in my whole life she could get cancer but she has now and I'm so scared. It devastated me hearing this news and also brought back lots of old memories. I can't even say who this person is right now because everyone is keeping it very hush right now. If it's possible to pray for her without knowing who she is, please do. And soon I'll update with who it is. I realized that life was just TOO good for the last 7 weeks and that something had to go wrong soon. Then I came back here and one thing after another happened. You'd think I'd be used to this by now. I know though that God has a reason for it all and a purpose for everything He does. Through this all I've also learned what a blessing it is to have family be there for you through the valleys and on the mountain tops. (Thank you guys!)

Thanks for all the prayers on my Grandma who is int he hospital, means a lot to me! :)

Franklin Springs Contest!

2009-03-19T14:56:00.003-05:00

Franklin Springs Family Media has just announced a fun and entertaining new contest. Submit a video or photo slideshow of you with your family, or by yourself, making a recipe featured on one or more of the Homestead Blessings DVDs; The Art of Breadmaking, The Art of Soap Making, or The Art of Candle Making. To read more about this contest and to see rules go to their website at www.franklinsprings.com or click HERE

I highly reccomend for you all to give this a try and go for it! It would be a fun thing to do with your family if your experienced or not with video.

Update on my Grandma

2009-03-16T13:07:00.002-05:00

Thank you to all of you who have been praying for my Grandma and for me. I really really appreciate it and also let her know that there were many people out there praying for her! She says Thanks also! :) Yesterday was the first day I got to see her. Apparantly she was much better yesterday, but to me she looked pretty bad. :( I'm not good with techinical names and stuff but I'll do my best to give an update.

There appears to be NO cancer, which I am SO thankful for. Praise God! She still is in critical condition though with this infection. Seems that the infection in her body wants to try to fight off any foreign object in her body like the fake hip, pacemaker, and her port. Since her heart is still very bad the pacemaker must stay but the hip is going to come out. She is on lots of antibiotics trying to fight this infection off, but still it must come out. The port is coming out today which I was told is an easy percedure, but hip will be very tough. I remember when my Grandma got the fake hip in, she was very healthy and came out of surgery super weak and pretty bad off. Well this time she is going into surgery very weak and not so good at all. Her oncologist was hoping they could bypass this surgery, but it seems to be necessary. :( If all goes well with surgery, the plan is to put in a concrete hip for the meantime and then my Grandma will be switched to an Assisted Living place so she can have help 24/7. She wont be able to move like she can now with the concrete hip. After the 5-7 weeks there she will need to be moved to some sort of apartment or something. We were talking about it yesterday and tossed around a few ideas. She wont be able to do steps, and all the houses we have, have steps where the bedrooms are. :( So most likely she will rent an apartment for awhile and we will take care of her that way.

I'm not sure what this means for me. I of course will do whatever for my Grandma, and if she needs me there I will be there for her, but I am really missing home. I love my family here, but it's so hard being away from everyone back at home now. For the last 7 weeks or so I've had company everyday and have stayed busy and I just loved it. Today I feel lost, being at my Dad's house by myself and well having nothing to do. Mostly what I do here is txt or talk or chat online with everyone back at home! :D

Anyway, Thursday is my Grandma's hip surgery and if you all could still be praying she makes it out of surgery safely. Also be praying for my Grandpa. I can't go into too much detail, only because I dont know, but he is not doing well at ALL. A lot of mental problems it seems like. He just can't take all of this. He feels like he just went through this with my Mom and now his wife. He seems to be going dillusional. He is still in FL though and there is nothing we can do but pray for him. He has mentioned though that he can't live longer than my Grandma, he has to go first and then a few nights ago he took a ton of sleeping pills, so it's just very scary for us. Both my Grandparents are Christians, that's why I think he must be out of his mind right now, he is never like this. :(

As for other news...I shot my first wedding on Saturday for John and Audra Notgrass! Boy, was I ever nervous, I even broke out in a rash or hives or something on my arms during the ceremony....never been so nervous in all my life! :D Once the ceremony was going though I calmed down I think and it got better. I was so thankful to Joan for all the help she gave me that day too. And Nathaniel Bluedorn, he showed up at the wedding and offered for me to use his camera, what a blessing that was to me! I had two cameras then to shoot with and his camera is just SOOO nice so it was a tremendous blessing! :) Keep a look out on my photo blog and I'll post some wedding ones when I get back home and can edit some! :)

Not too much planned for the week, I'll be painting my sisters room on Wednesday and then have a photoshoot to do for a family next Saturday but other than that, its pretty much just boring! :) Hope you all have a great week!

Lee's, I love you guys so much and miss you tons! Can't wait to come back home!

My Grandma...

2009-03-12T17:28:00.003-05:00

Not exactly an "update" post but a crying out asking you all to PLEASE pray for my Grandma (Mamaw). My Grandma who lives in FL, has recently had a lot of pain in her hip. She has already had both hips replaced so when she went to the hospital it ended up being some kind of infection. I really didn't think much of it. Well, after further searching, it seems that it is an infection in her bone and blood. The doctors there wanted to give her some kind of concrete hip and have her bed ridden for 5-7 weeks and then try do a replacement hip. Also they are possibly considering bone cancer...something I can't even let my mind consider right now as an option.

Well, to make this shorter, my Grandma left the hospital in FL without the doctors approval and will be flying to St. Louis tomorrow to get treatments there. I guess STL is known for having the best hospitals and from experience she believes it.

Please, PLEASE just be praying for her though. I have to believe that this will just be treated easily and there will be no cancer. What scares me is that the doctors in FL were saying that the infection in her blood could kill her over night if not treated right away. :( God is in control though and knows what is wrong with my Grandma. :( It's just so hard to think that this is happening.

Life surely is a journey, mountain tops and valleys. I guess I've been up on the mountain tops too long and it's time for another hard trial. :( I just don't feel ready for this one, ESPECIALLY if it's bone cancer. I watched my Mom die, and I can't do that with my Grandma also.

The plan was to go back to St. Louis tomorrow to do the wedding on Saturday. I was going to stay a week in MO, but now I think plans to come home are postponed. I don't want to stay gone too long though, I'll miss everyone so much here. I'll try to keep you all updated....

Pictures up!

2009-02-26T15:04:00.002-06:00

Just wanted to let you all know that I have pictures from being here up on my photography blog! :) Click HERE

Here's a sneak peak though! ;)

Not so frequent blogger... :)

2009-02-25T14:09:00.002-06:00

Okay, so I had all these great plans to write a long blog post and update you all on what's going on, but I spent my internet time talking to my dear friend Bethany instead. :( Sorry! Maybe she can update for me sometime! :)

I'll say this much....I LOVE it here! I can't imgaine not living with them now. Sometimes it is hard for me to even realize this is real, it's too good to be true in my mind. I love them all so much, they are just a wonderful family! There has been a few things that have happened and it's just been so neat to me to feel a part of a "real" family again. Not that my family wasn't real, but it's like I have my Mom back, I love Dawn just like my own mother and she treats me just like a daughter. When I was sick with a cold (AGAIN) she was so sweet to bring my my vitamins each morning adn then making me my "special" tea 3 times a day for me to drink. It was just so neat to me to see how much she cared for me, and she got me well very fast too! :)

Jordan has been a great brother too! I've always said that I wished I had an older brother living at home with me...well he isn't older than me, but he kind of acts that way...SOMETIMES! ;) It's neat though, because he isn't just like a brother to me, he's a really great friend! :) They all are! :)

Gabrielle is SO much fun! I think she's enjoyed taking my old clothes I don't want anymore and cutting them up and turning them into skirts and things! :) She is quite creative. She's been so sweet to show me how to play different things on the piano also and helping me out with cooking! :)

Christian, who is called "Cupcake" sometimes, is fun too...and funny! :D Except when he chases me around with a chicken in his hand! (Gab too) :P I've been teaching him spanish and he does SO well, an eager learner! :)

Adrian, Isaac, and Kaleb are of course loads of fun too! I never realized I get to have so many brothers!!! Boys are so much fun though! :) I enjoy doing anything with them, reading a book, playing a game, doing our workout class...doing spanish skits! ;)

Are you guys getting the idea here...?? I love them so much!

Also I was kind of worried about what Dawn's daughter Jessica would think of me coming and her husband Jamie. I guess I am still not sure what they think about it, but I love being with them and around them. They are very sweet and Tuesdays when Jess is here it's great! She's sooo sweet! :) Jamie is kind of wild, but fun! ;) :P Just kidding..he's not too bad! ;)

Well, I really should be going. I need to get some spanish done with the kids! Just know, I love it here! I'm so thankful that God brought me this family and has let me live here with them! It's too good to be true it feels like!

Hopefully I can update more soon, with real updates on what we've been doing. My computer isn't hooked up right now to internet, but when we do I can do pics and stuff. :)

Have a great week, month, year..whatever it will be till I blog again! ;)

Currently...

2009-02-05T16:32:00.002-06:00

Okay...so I know you have all been wanting to see who won the Film Festival but...you'll have to wait! :D :D :D (I know you already know who, but I might have some fun pics to post!) There is a lot going on right now and that's why I haven't been blogging too much and am interrupting my "festival posts" AGAIN to give you an update. :)

Hmmm....where to even beging? In November I met this reallly nice family, The Lees. I had heard a lot about them but got to know Dawn through email and then she in turn talked about her family so it felt like I knew them. Well since Christmas I have been praying a ton about the possibility of moving up to IL where they live and living with their family. I'm sure you don't want all the details of how this came about but it is pretty amazing how God worked it all out and brought it about. Well God has been unbelieveable in answering prayers for us, so right now I'm in Franklin Grove, IL at the Lee's house on a "trail period" The trial period time is more for them though, to see if they can handle me! :D We are still all praying I think but I really have a peace about my decision to stay here. Lord willing we will be going back down to MO on Valentines Weekend to get some more of my stuff and I can see some of my family again. I'm getting sick of the few shirts I brought too! :D Time for change! ;)

My time here at their house has been GREAT though! We've done so many fun things! :D They've also played so many pranks on me since I've been here...or have made jokes. Like when I first got here the guys told me that they had to widen the door frames for me because of my "big hair" BAD HUH? :D :D Speaking of big hair though...I think I've been quite the influence on this family because I have some pretty interesting photos of them to post as soon as my computer gets hooked up to their internet! :D Watch out Jordan! :D :D Pranks have included asian beetles, racoon skins, mink skins, goat placentas, pizza shoved in my face, watching "outlawed" videos on my computer and listening to songs that were OFF LIMITS! Anyway...I've gotten some of them back (the goat placenta was my idea..and it went UNDER Jordan's pillow one night, but... :( sadly he slept downstairs that night and didn't even sleep on it!) UGH He got grossed out though later when he saw! :D

Spite all these pranks, I LOVE it here...love this family! I could go on and on about them and how wonderful it is, but you'll just have to meet them! :D I'll be posting pictures soon too...well maybe not Sooooon, but sometime you'll get them! okay?

Now you know what is going on though and you know I haven't fallen off the planet or anything..I'm alive! ;)

Photo Dare

2009-01-21T17:22:00.005-06:00

Okay, I'm veering off again! :( That post WILL come soon though, okay? The festival winner I mean! :)

So, Bethany decided to change the game up some just to get me back I think! I wasn't even going to do it, and she wanted me to post THIS photo, but :( Oh boy....she had to do a lot of "makin' me feel bad" to get this posted!

It's called "PHOTO DARE"

Rules:

1. Be brave and post the scariest picture you can find of yourself.
2. Tag one other person, more if you'd like but this is a dangerous game.
3. Go hide in your closet when your done.

I'll definitely be hiding this time! This is one SCARY pic of me! I wont even explain it though!! Beware!!!!!

I will tag
same people as last time! :)

Photo Tag!

2009-01-21T10:40:00.004-06:00

Well I am going to have to interrupt my Film Festival posts with this fun little tag! :) I'll warn you, it CAN be scary but thankfully I picked an okay hardrive so although this picture isn't good, it's not creepy like some of them I have! :D

I was tagged by my dear friend Bethany

Here's the rules

1. Choose the 4th folder where you store pictures on your computer.

2. Select the 4th picture in the folder, and post it on your blog.

3. Explain the picture.

4. Tag four people to do the same.

5. No cheating (cropping, editing, etc.)

Okay, so your wondering why Mandy and I look so tired and sunburnt and WOW, Danielle is in OVERALLS!! :Shock: ??? Well, this picture was taken on our annual fishing trip at the Lake of the Ozarks. Each May, we have this fishing trip with my Dad, we've been doing it for umm...a long time, maybe 7 or 8 years!!!! I ALWAYS wear those overalls too! :D :D It's my fishing gear! ;) My Dad does jug fishing so we go out early early morning to get the jugs and catch the big fish. This was taken after getting our fish and Mandy and I were walking back up to the cabin and getting ready to sleep some more! :) This picture is probably 4 years old...something like that!

Okay for the people I tag!!! :)

Crystal
The Twins
The Lees
Bethany, you need to do another picture...New hardrive! ;)

Film Festival!!!!!

2009-01-15T10:54:00.010-06:00

Well Part 2, here it is! :) The day of the festival started out with a little picnic type thing in the park by the Convention Center. They did this last year for CF.org and CMF members so this year, I'm not sure who all was invited, but lots of my friends were there! :) It was great being able to see everyone before the festival actually started because from that point on things are pretty crazy! Let's see...who was there?? The Bluedorns, Naylors, Tulls, Leddens, Burns, Stephen Nasby, Nathan Daher and his friend, Chris Ong, Sarah and Kristen (the girls we met at the academy), there were just so many people...can't name everyone I guess! :D It was really nice talking with them all!

John Naylor and Helena Bluedorn

Chris Ong and Stephen Nasby-first time meeting them both

Nathanial Bluedorn

By 6:30 or so it was time for it all to start! It was so exciting just being back in that theater! The opening ceremony was quite long. Mr. Phillips started out by talking to us all and introducing some different speakers like Mr. Botkin, Mr. Swanson, R.C. Sproul Jr. and others. Then Mr. Phillips narrated while Charlie Zahm played guitar and sang. It was kind of neat I guess...I'm just not a fan of guys in kilts! :( Kind of weird for me, but his first song "Be Thou My Vision" was really REALLY good! Wish I could play guitar like that! :)
Later in the evening George Sarris did one of his performances on "Joshua and the battle of Jericho" it was...interesting! :P I think we were all getting tired from being in there so long and getting antsy to see the first movie! :) Around 9:30 they were about finished so we ran down to a different theater to see the first movie of the festival "Click Clack Jack" It was a cute movie, and had great production value! It was one fun day that's for sure, but we were ready for bed by the time the movie was over!
Friday was probably the most exciting day for me!!!! Can't wait to tell you all that happened! :D :D It started out with a great movie by the Sampley Family (sp?) "Dad the Hero of the Wild Wild West" I think everyone enjoyed it and it was quite comedic too! :) From that film we were on to the big theater to see "Secrets of Jonathan Sperry" I was probably most excited to see this film! I had read a lot about it and I LOVE Christiano films, so I knew I'd love this one as well.

The movie ended up being better than I would have guessed actually! It had me laughing a ton and crying so much by the end! Mandy and I were especially touched by this film I think. Can't wait for it to become available on DVD! :) Afterwards Rich Christiano stood up for a Q&A time for the film. Oh I forgot to say, before the film started, Mandy and I tried to go up to Rich Christiano to talk to him, but he was speaking with this other man. As soon as the conversation ended, he bolted! :D We were left standing next to this older gentleman. It ended up his name was Wendall Moody. Our last names caught eachothers attention and it was an immediate conversation starter! At the time of us talking we had no idea who it was that we were talking with! :) The movie was about to begin though and he asked Mandy and I to come up after the movie so he could introduce us to Rich!!!! So, after the film we did just that! He was in the front row and we went up to join him! Rich came down and this man introduced us like he had known us for years! :) Ends up that Mr. Moody was the man that got Rich and his brother into making Christian films! How neat, huh? He had been doing Christian films since at least 1980. He said he worked with Dean Jones in 1980 on a film, 'The Music Box'. He said he was getting ready to re-release it and gave us his email so Mandy and I could get copies of it! Such a sweet man and a blessing to man I'm sure! Of course Mandy and I couldn't walk away without getting a picture with these two guys! :)

We only saw a few more films that day, Fireproof which of course is WONDERFUL, The Prodigal Trilogy and then the LeClerc's film "The Other Son" After that Caleb, Daniel, Bethany and I went to the special reception thing for some of the Academy members! It started at 3:45 and we had planned to only stay 20 min or so, not knowing what the reception would be like. Well, I'll say this much, it was SOOOOOOOO GREAT! Another highlight of my trip! There were only like 50 people there and that included all the guys that made the feature films and the press. I was very excited for this certain someone to walk in and then in he came....KIRK CAMERON! :) Can you guys tell how excited I am?? Or was! ;) Okay, so maybe I'm playing it up some, but it WAS neat for me. I used to watch Growing Pains (not that I'm proud of that) but I've watched him since I was pretty young! lol Well when he first walked in we couldnt say hi or anything because Mr. Phillips started to talk, but he was RIGHT there behind me, I was like....woah, this is kind of weird! :) As soon as the talk was done though we got to meet him. He was such a nice guy and very much so down to earth, just a normal person! :) We've joked that I have this invisible sign around me that says "TEASE ME" because people naturally do it, and even he did. He made some sort of joke that he couldn't talk to me because I wasn't press! At first I was nervous to ask about a picture because I didn't know if he'd like it or not but after a little teasing when I asked he said yes! :) Now getting the picture was tough though, the person taking it didn't really know how to use my camera, so this picture was actually our third try! Kirk said that he was glad we got to redo it though because he was feeling guilty since he did a goofy face! :D
So after meeting him and talking to lots of other people it was time for dinner I think. :) Then on to the night session thing. This time the Von Trapp Children were there to sing...that was REALLY neat! They have amazing voices! These kids are actually the great grandchildren of Captain Von Trapp, I think. They did an amazing job!

After the singing, Stephen Kendrick and Kirk Cameron came out and did a Behind the Scenes type thing on Fireproof, it was very neat! Everyone enjoyed hearing from them I am sure!
After their talk, Mr. Phillips introduced well known actor, Dean Jones. This man has been acting for so many years. He acted in many Disney films including, "The Love Bug, Snowball Express, The Shaggy D.A, Under the Yum Yum Tree, and Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo" He also stars in a new series by Crown Financial Ministries. He started in Abraham and Isaac and then we were all So blessed to be able to be at the World Premiere of these short films!!!!
The films were incredible! They showed Abraham and Isaac, The Widow and the Oil, and The Rich Man and Lazarus. Abraham and Isaac actually had me in tears. I kind of felt silly crying over a story I had heard time and time again, but seeing this made it all so real!

Saturday, our last day there was once again a great day!!! I guess everyday was though. By Saturday though my voice was almost gone and I wasn't feeling the greatest! :( Can you tell by the pictures?? I look SOOO tired! :D Anyway Saturday was my day to see quite a few films! "Sound of a Dirt Road", some of "Pendragon", "The Widow's Might" and "Bread Alone"

In between films we had to get some pictures! ;) (Me, Sage, Helena, Mandy and Tera)

Me, Helena, Sage, and Mandy

John and I have a hard time getting pics I think...he is always being goofy and I try to straighten him out! :D

SUCCESSFUL!

Sage and I matched this day...both had tealish colored tops on and then brown skirts/pants :) Lane photoshopped this one, so we look a little umm...different! :D
Mandy and I had a friend living in San Antonio so some of us met up with him at a Starbucks right across the street. We hadn't actually "met" before so it was neat. Mandy kind of organized it all so we had a nice time chatting at Starbucks then walked around the Riverwalk some. He also came in and saw Widow's Might! What a good one to see! :) We had fun getting to know Jehred Clott though (Clott is not REALLY his last name, inside joke I guess) :)

Caleb, Mandy, Jehred, and Me

Andrew trying to hide from me!

Caleb...umm....well yea, that's him! :D

Once again a picture of my beautiful friend Besh!!! :) Enjoying her white chocolate mocha thing...I think! :P

Well, that's all for Part 2. It would have just been WAY too long to do the awards ceremony on here too!!!! Sorry! Maybe tomorrow I"ll post that! :) Hope you enjoyed it!!!!

Film Academy...

2009-01-14T10:27:00.009-06:00

As you all know, I have been gone for the past two weeks in Oklahoma and San Antonio, TX! It was a wonderful trip! I learned lots and had tons of fun! I took almost 3000 pictures while I was gone so it's taking me a very long time to weed through them and downsize the ones I want. So you all know, none of these are edited the way I want them, but for the blog they'll just have to do! :) Also...I decided to do these blog posts in different parts! It would just be way too long to blog about, OK, New Years, The Academy and the Festival! So this is Part One I guess you could say, THE ACADEMY! This will probably be the shortest of all posts too!
Sunday, the 4th, Bethany, Caleb, Daniel, John-Clay and I all drove down to Texas. Boy, was that an adventure! If you can believe it, none of us slept, we stayed up and talked the whole time! :D :D We had some very funny conversations and well, played quite a few jokes! ;) Sorry to those who go the brunt end of them! :P John-Clay had a friend, Mr. Putz, who let us stay at his house during the academy. He was such a nice man. I'm not sure I've ever seen anyone so hospitable. Bethany and I had the entire upstairs and our own thermostat which meant we could take the temp up to 75!!! :D :D He pretty much treated us as royalty! :) Also on January 5th, the anniversary for the day my Mom passed away, he bought me roses. It was SOO sweet of him. He actually left them on the desk next to my bed and it had a card with a verse from Proverbs 31 on it. His wife had died in 2004 so he definitely knows what it is like to lose someone. :(

Okay, so on to the academy! They were about the longest days I have ever lived I think! :D Although the week went by fast, the days were slower! :) Not that I'm completely complaining though! ;) I really did enjoy the academy they just had some very VERY long lectures! The first day actually Bethany and I skipped the last "real" lecture and went out in the lobby to have fun! :) It was a three hour session on Sci-Fi Movies and well, that really didn't interest me at all! After that though there was a lecture starting at like 10:30 on photography and of course I was there! Now you have to know this...while Bethany and I were out "having fun" we did get ourselves in a little bit of trouble! :D After being silly and taking pictures of eachother we decided we wanted to go exploring some! Our first sign that we shouldn't have been doing this was probably that the escalator wasn't turned on, but we ignored that and decided to just walk up it! So first we go into this one room and Bethany's like "Oh, we should run across these chairs!" To my surprise and Bethanys, I did it! :D So after running across I went into this back room and was thinking...'where am I?' It looked like some sort of warehouse! So then all of a sudden Besh heard some keys jingling and hid. I was on the other side of the door so it wasn't that easy for me. I kept quiet for a minute, then decided to look in the room and I saw a security guard! :S As soon as he saw me I took off running! NOT a good idea!!!!!!!! So Besh and I started running, and went to go in this one room, but the door was locked, I kept thinking "oh no..what are we going to do??" So we found this other door and ran into the bathroom hoping that the security guard was a guy! (I know, I saw the person but couldn't tell if it was a girl or guy) So we got in there and I was still SO scared! SHe went in a stall and I went in the next and of course, my door wouldn't shut. I yelled to Bethany, "It wont shut, Bethany, it wont close!!!" I was soo scared! Anyway to make this short, we ended up leaving the bathroom and went directly downstairs safe from the security guards! Whew! No more adventures for us!!!!

During the Academy we got to hear a lot of good speakers, Mr. Botkin, Isaac Botkin, Stephen Kendrick, Ben Botkin, and others. I really enjoyed the talks on cinematography, color correction, storyboarding, and how to improve a film in 10 minutes! :) Although you may think I didn't pay attention much, I DID take lots of notes. Sadly though, I left them all in our hotel room. :( SOooo sad!

It was lots of fun too, seeing old friends, and new ones! :) I recognized sooo many faces and names, but wasn't sure HOW I knew them. I think I started to aggravate Bethany with saying, "Oh, I know him somehow. How do I know him?" :D One day we had a pretty long lunch break, so we all headed to the Alamo. Besides the scary encounter with the birds it was a fun trip! We met up with some friends there and had fun talking! :) I learned what the Alamo was too...(I must have skipped that history lesson in school) Okay, well these last few photos were just ones I took during the academy! I have a TON more but these were either just funny ones, or random ones I took! :) I'll just leave a caption so you know who they are.

Mr. Botkin at the end of the academy

Isaac Botkin

Stephen Kendrick and his son...his son was SOO cute and friendly!

My wonderful friend Bethany, aka Besh

Scott Eash, someone new I got to meet

Sarah, a great friend I met! :) I'll post more of her in other posts!

Chad Burns, director of Pendragon

Caleb

John-Clay

Daniel

Daniel took a picture for us one night on the Riverwalk

Jimmy Broyden- professional stuntman

Outta Here! :)

2008-12-29T13:41:00.002-06:00

Well today is the day I leave for Oklahoma!!! :) Lately I've had a lot on my mind and just different things going on so this will be a nice trip! :) I fly into Tulsa this evening and then my friend Bethany Morris, will be there to pick me up! It will be SO great to see her again!!!! So yea, your probably wondering "why is she flying into Tulsa and not OKC?" Well for a few reason! ;) So, Besh was so kind to say she'd drive to get me there though, so it will be a nice 2 hour drive back to their house together, and I THINK Hannah Burnett will be with her, so that should be fun! :)

I'll be staying with the Morris' until the 3rd or 4th or something and then Caleb, Daniel, Bethany, me and John-Clay will be driving down to San Antonio for the Film Academy. Sometimes I wonder if I was out of my mind when buying my ticket, but too late now and I'm sure it will be fun! :) At least I get to be with friends, right? :) So then the rest of her family will be coming down around the 8th and staying for the festival! Mandy will be flying down too, so I'll get to spend time with her in Texas. Many friends of mine will be there, so it'll be a mini reunion! ;) I'm excited to see everyone! So then that goes until the 11th, and we will all drive back to the Morris' and then I fly home the 12th. I'll be a busy two weeks I am sure, but I'm looking forward to it. Also I'm going to the Naylors New Years party so it will be wonderful spending time with them as well!

I know this is a short post, but I have to get going. We are leaving in like 15 min. and I have to get my last minute things together! :) Still need to print off my ticket also..yikes! :) Better run! Hopefully I can update once or twice while gone, but I may not have any computer down in Texas so who knows!

Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas! And have a very blessed New Year!

Christmas Eve

2008-12-24T21:52:00.008-06:00

EDIT:: I am getting the flu I think, so since I've been feeling SO sick I can't exactly finish this post...the pictures are going to be in a very random order! :( Sorry..

Can you believe it is STILL Christmas Eve and I've already got my pictures downsized and up on this blog!!! :) (pretty good, huh Besh?) ;) I didn't do any editing though, so THOSE kinds of pictures will be posted on my other blog, probably months from now! ;) (just kidding!) I actually decided to do this post so soon because I started really missing my Mom. I began to dwell on the fact that she isn't here and well that happens a lot when the house gets quiet. :(

Okay, so moving on...I had a wonderful evening with my sisters and Jason. Tara ended up picking me up from Kim's at 11:30 so we got to hang out most of the day! :) We wrapped presents, looked at wedding photographers, just talked and well...oh, went to the grocery store! :) Then Mandy came there when she got off work around 3:30. Once she got there we started to do our gift exchange, which was fun! We were all being silly! We'd pick up the gift and try to guess what it was! Some guesses were a hamster, dog, toaster...all things that definitely didn't match the description of the box! :D It was funny! :D Jason started the unwrapping first with a new bottle of cologne from Tara. (Oh, the Jason I am referring to is Tara's boyfriend) :) So I guess I'll let the pictures explain most of the rest! Let's see some of the gifts were cologne, video game, bath and body works stuff, air freshener (LOL), socks, shirts, lip balm, iPhone cases, kitchen stuff, back massager for your chair, and much more!! :D Tara told me before hand.."Danielle, it'd be so funny for people to see what I got you!" Now I see why..one thing was the air freshener. One might ask WHY she'd get me that, but the reason is...Tara's house smells SOOOoooOO good! :) And she has this thing that every so often sprays out this really good smell! :) So, I mentioned how much I liked and it and she got me one! :) Also the socks...we were discussing how I am totally out of socks, so I just dont wear any! :D :D Well she got me two packages of socks!!! lol Anyway, it was kind of funny!

For Tara I did a memory board type thing for her. She told me many times that she wanted pictures of my Mom but I had them all, so finally it clicked and I decided to do this for her. I was kind of scared what she would think of it, but she ended up liking it I think.

Well, Mandy is up now so maybe I wont be quite so lonely! :) When we got home I played with Luke for awhile and then came down to just read my bible and write. So then Mandy came down a little while later and I read out of Luke to her, the Christmas Story. Well, she has been on meds since she is sick and they wipe her out, so when I was done reading she was snoring away! ;) (she'll get mad if she sees this!) :D :D

Guess I should get to bed so I'm rested up for tomorrow!! Hope you all have a very Merry Christmas! Let's keep our focus on Jesus, the TRUE meaning of Christmas!

Lots of thinking...

2008-12-16T21:16:00.002-06:00

For many different reasons today has been a difficult day for me. I feel like that in life I am constantly being stretched. Almost like God is pulling me as far as I can go until I just bust. I know He isn't and that my perception is just wrong, but I feel like I'm there...I'm ready to just burst! I feel like giving up.....not on the Lord but on life. One of the hardest things for me I think is reading others blogs or talking with friends who have "normal" lives. I hear about all these fun things they do, or see pictures from get togethers. Then I see family pictures and hear stories of what they did as a family and I just hurt SO much inside when all this happens. I know what's wrong with me...I'm jealous, and it's not good at all, but I want that SO bad. I want to have good friends near by and a family that all lives together and loves the Lord and has a similar vision. I know this wont happen though, not right now anyway. God has me in this situation for a reason but like I said, I feel like I can't be stretched anymore. :(

I'm encouraged by many verses though, and as I prayed about all this tonight I just decided to open up to Psalms and start reading.

Psalm 18:6 "In my distress I called upon the Lord, and cried unto my God: he heard my voice out of his temple, and my cry came before him, even into his ears"

Pslam 16:1-11 "PRESERVE me, O God: for in thee do I put my trust. O my soul, thou hast said unto the Lord, Thou art my Lord: my goodness extendeth not to thee; But to the saints that are in the earth, and to the excellent, in whom is all my delight. Their sorrows shall be multiplied that hasten after another god: their drink offerings of blood will I not offer, nor take up their names into my lips. The Lord is my portion of mine inheritance and of my cup: thou maintainest my lot. The lines are fallen unto me in pleasant places; yea, I have a godly heritage. I will bless the Lord, who hath given me counsel: my reins also instruct me in the night seasons. I have set the Lord always before me: because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved. Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoiceth: my flesh also shall rest in hope. For thou wilt not leave my soul in hell; neither wilt thou suffer thine Holy One to see corruption. Thou wilt shew me the path of life; in they presence is fullness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore. "

I have studied this passage quite a bit tonight. And at first it was like, "Okay Lord, what am I supposed to learn from this?" In the first verse it is like David is fleeing to God for protection, having confidence that He will be protected. I feel like this a lot and tonight especially. I know that my only help, safety, comfort, comes from resting in Him. Then it's almost as David commits himself completely to God and rejects any practices of the world as in blood offerings to other gods. He rejoices in the Lord being his inheritance and gives all glory to God. This is what I want. I want to reject what the world is telling me and completely commit myself to Him. What we have here on earth is only temporary but I'm looking forward to eternity. Like David, I want to reject what the world is telling me (getting a loan, dating, moving out, etc.) and seek the Lord and do HIS will! And in this world sorrow is our lot, but in Heaven there is joy, REAL joy. Our pleasures here are temporary, but at His right hand, the pleasures are forevermore. Hallelujah! I'm looking forward to that!

Anyway, that probably made no sense at all. I'm so scattered brained right now I think, but I wanted to write to get some of this out..and hopefully I can fall asleep now too. :) It helps me a lot to write and makes the crying stop! ;)

Christmas Tree Decorating!

2008-12-08T13:58:00.004-06:00

Well this post will mostly just be filled with pictures but I'll do captions or something to help explain, if needed! :) I finally got these imported to my computer though so I wanted to post them! :) It was so dark in our basement though and I didn't want to use a flash so the pictures are very very grainy! :(

First here are the couches I had mentioned that we bought! :) Now we have a cozy area to watch movies or just to relax! Plus it makes it look more homey then just a big empty room! :)
(According to Lane this is not our couch, it's a friend of mine's couch! :D :D ) Whoever's it is...it's comfy! :)

(Our first real tree...it was much smaller than our normal trees, but that's okay)

(Luke watching as we decorate the tree)

(Getting the lights ready)

(Not sure why I took this picture, but yes, that's my cell phone, an item I have with me almost always) :)

(This year we did a "themed" tree...not sure if I mentioned this already..sorry if I did. So anyway, the ornaments are all blueish and silver and white with a snowflake theme to them)

(My Dad putting the star on for us...yes the tree is short, but I still wasn't tall enough to get it on right)

(The finished tree!)

"I Jesus have sent mine angel to testify unto you these things in the churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, and the bright and morning star." Revelation 22:16

An Update

2008-12-07T15:37:00.004-06:00

Well I'm not even sure what to write, but I know it's been awhile since I've updated. :) Plus I have some time right now while waiting on Mandy. :)

Last week was my first week back to work since my month off. It was good to see the kids again but it was so different going back. 2 days a week I am pretty much by myself because Hanah is at preschool in the mornings and then takes her nap in the afternoons. Then once Dave gets home I stay in my room downstairs. Soo...this means lots of time alone. It was pretty hard for me this week, I'm thinking mainly because I had been home so long. I got used to having someone with me all the time! :) Either I'd be holding Luke or playing with Lane or talking with Mandy. I missed that a lot. On Wednesday, I about totally lost it! :) I wanted to go home SOOOO badly, I missed everyone, but it snowed that night and we had ice so I couldn't take the risk of going home and not being able to get back to their house for work. But, my older sister Tara was a life saver! :) She didn't even know I was having such a hard time, but called out of the blue and asked if I wanted to come over! :) So she was so kind to come pick me up and take me back that night. I made pizzas for dinner at their house and then we just pretty much hung out! :) I then talked to a friend that night for a long time, so that gave me even more "interaction" with people! :) Thursday I went back over to Tara's house and Mandy came too. I made dinner again for them and then we just played around! :D It was a LOT of fun! Also I was busy Thursday with lots of things, other than sitting in my room. :) I had bought a dress that needed to be hemmed and then had a few errands to run. :)

Friday was a GREAT day! :) Still amazed it worked out for me to go, but I was able to go to the last dance in Bloomington, IL. I was so hoping Mandy's boss would let her go with me (which means getting off work 3 hours early), but she said no. :( So, it was just me going. Kim ended up letting me off at 1:30 so after getting everything together I was off! :) Faith, Melody and Jason met me at the mall in Bloomington early so we could have dinner and shop for a little bit. That was fun! Of course I got a little bit embarrassed when Jason and Melody started to talk to random people. :D He would start waving to people he didn't even know! (just like the Naylor boys) :D It was all fun though. Then the dance was great! :) It was so neat seeing everyone in their fancy dresses!!! :) Even some of the guys dressed up and wore suits. Sadly though I got no pictures! :( I was going to, but I went to get my camera and I realized I left my camera ON the last time I used it. :( Soo..my battery was dead! Helena got at least 2 photos though, so when I get them from her I'll post them here. :) There weren't a whole lot of people there but it was a fun group.
Afterwards we went back to Kelli's house and just talked and some people played games. We had a fun discussion trying to figure out what animals we would be based off our personality! :) That was QUITE the conversation! :) So anyway, on Saturday I got up early and left for home. The drive went well (thanks to all my friends who kept me company along the way by talking to me) and I was home by 12:00. :) I had one small thing happen at a gas station on the way home but I'll save you all from hearing that. Let's just say I am NOT good at pumping gas! ;)

Today since church I've just been home and hanging out with family. :) Also getting ready to get pictures of Mandy and Lane and then Mandy will get one of me. :) Angie got some new frames so she needs updated pictures of us. It's going to be getting dark soon though, so I better get to them, Mandy is finally off the phone and hopefully ready to go! :)

Okay, sorry for this boring post!!! :)

Can't sleep...

2008-11-28T22:43:00.002-06:00

.....Soooo, I write. :) Today has been a very interesting day. It started quite early for Mandy and me because we decided to join all the crazy people and go to Walmart at 5:00 am. Did I mention we are crazy?? We both had something we wanted to get and then Angie wanted us to pick some items up. Well.....we got there like 15 minutes after they opened and the items I wanted were already gone! :shock: I couldn't believe it. Thankfully, we got the things Angie wanted though. It was so crazy there though and we stood in line for 45 minutes to check out like 3 things! We made it home by 7:00 am though and then I of course went BACK to bed! I wasn't feeling too good, felt like a train had hit me or something. :) Also was having a very bad sore throat. So finally around 9 something I had to get up and get going with my day. :) (didn't want to)

So sometime during the day my Dad made and deal with Lane and me and said if we cleaned up the basement he would buy couches for down here soon! So, Lane and I got very excited and started on it right away. Our basement basically consist of one big room (and our bedroom) but it's filled with lots of baby stuff, stuff that Mandy and I brought over when we moved in, and then lots of stuff that belonged to Angie's parents. Originally the room was supposed to be used as a "game" room sort of. We have a pool table, air hockey table, and then a huge tv but we never use any of it. Oh and a dart board! :) Anyway, nough about that! Lane and I worked really hard and got it ALL cleaned up and amazed my Dad! :)

While I was cleaning I found something that was kind of weird. It was the divorce papers that my Dad had filed. I've heard about them, but never actually read them. So today I did....I never acutally knew the year they divorced because they were separated for several years, or so it seemed. I found out today though they were divorced in 1999, so I was 11 years old. It's hard to believe, but I was that old and still have very VERY few memories of my Dad living at home. :( It was kind of tough seeing all the stuff in the papers and especially my Mom's signature. Haven't seen that for quite some time.....It was also hard just because I knew my Mom had changed so much. She became a Christian after the divorce so it was not something she was at all proud of.

So after cleaning up Lane, we all watched a movie that was on TV, "The Family Man" (not saying I recommend this movie at all!) It was very odd that of all days this movie come on though. "The Family Man" was the last movie I had ever seen in theaters with both my Mom and Dad. I remembered they had been separated and My Mom took Mandy and I to see this film and invited my Dad to meet us there (around Christmas time) So he came...and it was the first time ever I saw my Dad cry. The movie was over and I remember thinking..."wow, they are going to get back together!" I was wrong...but apparently this movie has some importance in my Dad's life too. He remembered seeing the film and also remembered crying. This was the first time we have watched that movie since that day at the theater, but my Dad once again cried at the end. Of course he tried to hide it, which I understand, Angie was home, but still....it was so neat to me. I know my Dad misses my Mom. And I love that he does. I don't love that he is hurting, but I'm glad she isn't just forgotten by him. My Dad will always remember her.

So, I'm not really sure why I'm sharing that with all of you, but I was laying in bed trying to sleep and these thoughts just kept going round and round in my head. I prayed a lot and then decided to just get up and blog.

Guess I should get some sleep now though! :) Oh, never finished bout the couches!!!! lol Lane, my Dad, and I all went to the store and picked out a leather couch and recliner for the basement, so on Sunday they will be delivered!!!! YAY! :) Now we can watch Christmas movies downstairs and be extra cozy! ;)

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-27T17:11:00.002-06:00

I know it's been awhile since I've blogged on here but I wanted to do a quick post real but a longer one will be following soon. We've had a pretty full and busy day today but we are at the point now it's slowing down a little bit...and getting harder.

We woke up early and started cooking and cooked pretty much until 3:00 pm. All the food turned out good, which I'm happy about and we had a nice time just all working together! :) We all made something so there were a lot of us in the kitchen, but the time we had together was a blessing! :) Angie made rolls, mashed potatoes, and some casserole thing. Mandy made sweet potatoes and a turtle cheesecake, my Dad made two fried turkeys which were delicious but we only ate 1/2 of one! :) (I think we will be eating turkey for a LONG time) I made green bean casserole, corn casserole, this new kind of stuffing (which took forever) and then oyster dressing. So you know, I hate oysters or any sea food, but my Dad remembered my Mom making it so he wanted me to try. Those oysters looked SOOO gross! :( My Dad liked it though, so I'm happy about that. :) I think that was like everything and then my Grandparents came over and brought a pumpkin pie and lots of other goodies. :)

So we ate around 3:00 and we were all so stuff quickly. I think because we had been drinking punch and so it filled us up! After eating we cleaned up and I rocked Luke to sleep then it was time to get ready to go to meal number 2! :D Kyle, my brother, had no where to go for this Thanksgiving, so they had decided for all of us kids to just do it together. So Tara, my sister, and her boyfriend Jason, have been cooking ALL day for us! They have made TONS AND TONS of things and are actually finishing it up right now.

It's weird for me being here though, I know it shouldn't be but this is the first Thanksgiving us kids have all been together without my Mom. Last year we all did our own things. Usually on days like this (holidays) it's like I KNOW it will be hard, so I'd rather run from it. I'd rather not be with family so I don't dwell on the fact that "Wow, Mom's not here!" I know this is wrong of me and I should be thankful for the family I have left with me, and thankful that my siblings even are all together, (that doesn't happen too often) Soo...I'm trying. I escaped for just this little bit of time to come up here and blog just to get all this out.

Last year I had been thinking so much what a hard day that Thanksgiving would be and my friend said to me, "Danielle, it's not about you though. You have a new family you are with and you need to try to be a blessing to them and be thankful for what you DO have" So, I did that and last year went so well. So last night, that was my prayer again, that I could glorify God today with my actions and words and to be a blessing to my family. I didn't want to focus on my loss, but on the blessings God has given me. Guess writing this is helping me retrain my brain to do that and get out of this "slump" :D

I hope you all are having a wonderfully blessed Thanksgiving!

"Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Punta Gorda and Port Charlotte

2008-11-20T19:59:00.005-06:00

Today was another great day of course. My Grandma and I drove into Punta Gorda and Port Charlotte which was lots of fun. It was a lot closer than Anna Maria Island which was nice and just as pretty! :) Actually...the water was MUCH more blue here and it was warmer today so that was good also! :)

Well today basically consisted of lots of shopping! :) We went to a place called 'Fisherman's Village' and it was like a shopping mall all on a pier! A covered pier that is! :) It was pretty neat but very expensive stores. I found a cute dress but it was 80 dollars! YIKES! :) I did get a few souvenirs for my siblings which was nice and I did get two dresses and a shirt for myself (NOT 80 dollars) :)

Guess that's pretty much all we did, shop, then shop more, and then shop even more!! :) I guess I'll let the pictures do the rest of the explaining. :)

(Forgive me, I'm kind of in a weird mood tonight...wasn't even going to post but had the time so I did. Hopefully will be back to my normal self soon...just be praying for me please!) :)

(The view from the mall)

(If you can believe it, there were apartments for rent on TOP of the mall!)

(already decorated for Christmas....sooo pretty!) :)

(The gulf of Mexico)

(These boats were in the Harbor)

(Fisherman's Villiage)

(See the nice blue water?? I wanted to jump in and start swimming!) :)

(These ones were all taken through the car window)

Anna Maria Island- Day 2

2008-11-19T18:24:00.011-06:00

Okay, so this will be a short post but with LOTS of photos! :) Today my grandparents and I went BACK to Anna Maria (sorry thought it was Marie) Island today and this time didn't see dolphins but saw lots and lots and lots of birds! :) It was so neat though! :) We found the restaurant that we were supposed to eat at yesterday and had lunch there! :) It was neat to watch the birds get fish and the fishermen get fish as we ate! :) Hope you enjoy the pictures! :) Oh, the pics are out of order and since my computer is a tad bit slow I'm not going to take the time to put them IN order...also they aren't edited at all... :(

(A pelican...very neat bird! You'll see lots of these! ;)

(Our restaurant was out on the pier, which was really just a big dock! :) So these people sat outside and fished or did whatever...a very casual place!)

(Not sure what kind of birds these were...people kept saying seagulls, but I've never seen a seagull that looked this way)

(Tampa Bay...no we weren't in Tampa, but the bay reached this far...oh and yesterday I thought it was the Atlantic Ocean but really is was the Gulf of Mexico)

(Who knows what this is!)

(I know this one!!! A DUCK!)

(This is the pelican diving in to get the fish..I know it looks weird but that's what they look like!)

(This bird freaked me out! I was getting pics and I looked up and it was RIGHT over my head! I mean, like RIGHT there...it was sitting on the roof of the building and just wouldn't move, except it's eye...see how it has that thing that goes over it half way...creeeeepppy!)

(So you know, a lot of these pictures were taken through the restaurant window...sorry for lighting problems and how blurry some are)

(Thought this was so cute...the littler birders would just float right along with the Pelicans)

That's all!!! :)

Anna Marie Island

2008-11-18T19:08:00.007-06:00

So much for not being able to blog! :) I have more time here then I do at home I think. :D My Grandpa was So nice to import my pictures also and show me how to use the software for resizing pics also, soooo.....I have some pics from today to post! :)

My Grandma and I left around umm..10:00 or wait, is that MO time? I don't know somewhere around there and went to Bradenton. It felt like the drive took FOREVER but it was a nice time for my grandma and I to talk! :) (as long as I could keep my eyes open) ;) So we dropped off the projecter thing at the repair shop and then got to talking with the people there. My Grandma let the guy know that we were in the market for a nice photo printer, for my photography business. The man was So nice and showed us exactly what we needed to get! I'm pretty excited because the printer we are looking at it pretty big and will print on canvas and just does some really nice prints!!!! We'll see what happens though. :) It was a lot cheaper than I imagined too! So after discussing printers for an hour or so they told us about Anna Marie Island! :) They knew I was from St. Louis and wanted to see the beach! :) So we took their advice and drove down to the island! It was BEAUTIFUL! :) SOoo pretty! :) Once again it was quite the drive because my grandma was busy looking at the surroundings so we drove like 5 miles an hour on the island...very slow! Finally we made it toward a dead end and got out to walk around on the beach! :) My grandma was quite cold but I was loving it! :) I'm so used to CA beaches and Mexico beaches and well...they just aren't as pretty! The sand here was white and the water was so blue!!! :) It was a little bit chilly just because of all the wind! Besh, you should have seen me..my skirt plus the wind...NOT a good combination! ;) (wait a second, you SHOULDN'T have seen me) ;)

(My grandma's "bikini")

(A way way too close self-portrait)

After getting some pictures we drove around the block to the restaurant that was on the becah! :) It was tasty and so nice to be able to look out our window and see the birds and waves! :) We had a great time spending the day together there. :) I bought shirt/dress type thing as a souveiner there too, so I'll always remember Anna Marie Island! :)

On our way home was probably the most exciting though! As we were leaving the island there was a place to pull over and park and just look at the boats and stuff. Well, it looked like a nice place to get some shots so I told her I could just get out real quick and get a few pictures. I was busy getting pictures of this pier when my grandma started saying, "Look there is something jumping out of the water" Took me awhile to understand her and then I saw it...DOLPHINS!!! Like SOOO close to me also! :) They were so close to the shore, I couldn't believe it! I ran as fast as I could and got my zoom lens on so I could try to get a close shot of one of them. There were at least 6 dolphins out there playing! Well....some photographer I am, because I ended up just watching them play instead of looking through the lens and getting a shot of them jumping out of the water! :( I have a few though where you can see the little fin...hey, does it look like a shark? :D It was quite a thrill for me! :) I've seen dolphins before but they are usually kind of far away when we see them in Mexico. :)

So that was my day! :) After that we drove home and I slept some. I think tomorrow we are going to a different coastal town, and my Grandma thought I might see some manitees. That'd be neat!!! :) We'll see! :) Looks like I"ll get to blog each day though, so keep checking back! ;)
Can anyone guess what this picture is??? Leave me a comment!

I'm Here!

2008-11-18T08:25:00.002-06:00

Well I didn't exactly think that I would have time to be online very much while down here but things worked out differently I think. :) Soo....thought I'd do a quick post to just let you know I got here in sunny Florida! :) I had a nice quick flight and it's like 70 something degrees here during the day...WAY nice! :) Everyone here keeps telling me I brought the cold weather with me though, they are all going around with pants and sweatshirts on and little snow hats on their heads! :D Quite funny to see! :) It does get a lot cooler at night but still it's like lower 50's not 30's how it is in St. Louis.

A lot has changed since the last time I was here. I figured it out, it's been almost 6 years since I have been down to their house!!! They've changed the whole place around. They moved their furniture from their St. Louis house down to here so everything is rearranged. They have all their computers set up in their screened in porch room which is very nice. :) I had quite the surprise this morning. I had finished getting ready this morning and came and sat on the couch and my Grandpa came in a said, "Danielle, I got your computer set up now" I was pretty confused, so he brought me into the porch and he had set up my own desk with a computer they had put away in storage. He got it all hooked up and connected to the internet...it was so sweet of him! :) So now we all have our own little "station" in here! :)

I think today my Grandma and I are going to this town called Bradyenton (sp?) It's 50 miles away and I have no clue what we are DOING there, but she must have some sort of plans. :) She said it was 50 miles west and well if my geography is correct in 50 miles we would definitely hit the ocean or gulf or something...so who knows, maybe it's a costal town..OR I could have my directions mixed up...my friends have been proving to me that geography is NOT my strong suit! ;)

Oh yea...guess I should mention last weekend too! :) I had a GREAT time! :) I was quite scared making the drive up there by myself but it went pretty smooth and I got there in 5 1/2 hours. It was really nice to spend time with their family and get to know them better. Then on Saturday we woke up quite early and left for West Chicago for the young adult conference. There were lots of people there and the whole day just went really well. They had this one man that did calligraphy and wrote out Psalm 16:11 on this huge piece of paper and we talked about it phrase by phrase...it was just very neat! As soon as he was finished I leaned over to Melody and said, "I want that!" :D Well.....I ended up winning it!! :) They had a drawing later and everyone was supposed to put in their name so I did and Jason put my name in for his, so I thought okay...I at least have 2 names in there! :) Well, after winning Melody told me that she put 5 of my name in there for each person in their family!! :) How sweet, huh? Anyway I was pretty excited and think I let out a little scream even when they called my name! :) The conference was still great though even if I hadn't have won that! ;) The speaker they had was very good and at times convicting. I'm so glad God worked it all our for me to be able to be there! Then Sunday I got to go to their church and meet all the people I had heard SOO much about! :) The sermon was a blessing and encouragement to hear, if you can believe it, he talked about how God loves us...and even though we are going through these trials (like Ezekial did) God still LOVED Him. And with Mary, Martha, and Lazurus...Jesus made it clear he loved them even though it might not have seemed so to them in the midst of the trial. :) I felt like he was speaking on that subject just for me! :D Everyone I met there was so kind and friendly, just a blessing to be around! :) Thank you Hemmer Family for having me at your house for the weekend!!!! :) Oh, so I left their church right after lunch thinking it'd take me 5 1/2 hours again but my GPS took me a different way home and I got there in 4 hours!!! WOW! :) I was quite tired though making the drive but thanks to some very nice friends they kept me awake while talking on my cell phone! :)

Well, I guess I should end this post....if it's too long it gets boring and especially since I have no pictures to post. I DO have pictures but I left my card reader at home and well, don't want to bother my Grandpa with finding one for me. :) Hope you all are having a great week!!!!!! :)

Leaving for Awhile...

2008-11-14T08:02:00.002-06:00

Just wanted to write real quick to let everyone know I might not be blogging for a week or so. I'm going out of town this weekend and then I'll come home Sunday night and then we have a birthday dinner for my sister. So I'll get about an hour at home and then time to leave again. But that's not all...THEN I'll be going to my grandmas house that night so she can take me to the airport Monday morning to catch a flight to Florida to see my OTHER grandparents! :) This was a really last minute trip for me but my grandma suggested it and I found a really cheap ticket, so I'm going for a week! :) One of the shortest trips I've ever taken I think, but it will be fun! :) So I'll be back the 21st and hopefully will have lots to blog about! :)

Greg Wallace's Benefit

2008-11-09T18:33:00.008-06:00

Last Friday, the 7th, there was a benefit for Greg Wallace, a young man we have met through HSA with cancer. I'm not exactly sure how long he has had cancer but he has no health insurance and medical bills are expensive as most of you know, so the Bluedorns organized a benefit for him to help raise money. It was so neat. Cancer is something very close to me...and there were so many people who helped us out when my Mom was sick that I was very much so looking forward to this event to be able to extend the blessing. (Not that I had that much to give) It was an incredible night though. First of all I got to see tons of friends and meet new friends too! :) John and Sage were on their way home from MI so they were there for it also! The evening consisted of a pie auction, some dancing, pie eating contest, best pumpkin pie contest, silent auction, music, and lots of fellowship! It was so much fun and a blessing to be at. The pie auction was INCREDIBLE! Jason and Melody Hemmer were the auctioneers and did quite a good job at it! ;) They got people up to 375 for one cake!!! Actually the highest bidded item was this one fancy cake and it went for 1005 dollars!! It was just so neat to be there and see the body of Christ pulling together and being so generous with their money to help out Greg. By the end of the night they had raised....get ready for this! .........24,000 DOLLARS! Can you believe it?? God is SO good! Well, I have tons of pictures to post, so I'll just leave captions on them and let them explain more of the evening!! :)

(Mandy Culwell went with us to the benefit! Love you Ninja!)

(The photographer for the evening...Nathan Bluedorn)

(Mr. Hemmer)

(Melody bought ALL these raffle tickets for a violin and we were all SOOO happy when they called her number and she WON IT!!!)

(Our auctioneers for the night, Jason and Melody Hemmer...they did such a great job! And were quite comical!) :)

(Sage, Mandy and John watching as the pies went from 50 to 75 to 90 to 375!!!)

(Jason Stanford)

(Helena Bluedorn and John, and yes...John's jacket is inside out!)

(Collyn Hunt)

(I am not sure this guy's name, but he filmed a lot of the evening and they did interviews and stuff...I think they may be trying to make a documentary on how Christians pull together to help those in time of need..I could be wrong though!) :)

(John and Sage being goofy!)

(This is the violin that Melody won and John was playing for her....since I didn't take this picture I can't be certain, but I was told Melody was smiling this big when hearing John play! :D....isn't she pretty!)

(Time for some funny but kinda gross pics. The pie eating contest!)

(Getting ready for it...they had 60 seconds to eat the most they could with NO hands!)

(Jason and John going at it!)

(Nate Sisson after the 60 seconds was up)

(Jason afterwards, I don't think he was feeling too good. :( )

(John posing... I don't think he ate enough to feel SUPER sick)

(THE WINNER...Doug P. Isn't that gross? :( The guys had pumpkin pie in their beards..)

(Mrs. Bluedorn helping out with the auction....she is such a sweet lady!)

(Some of the pies that were being auctioned off)

(Some of the silent auction stuff. Many people brought gift baskets or things that had made or put together...it was neat!)

(Faith Hemmer, I think this picture is cute. She was actually getting a pic of a very cute little boy!)

(These are just some dancing pics...that first pic, I think I make that face a lot! ;) )

(The Hemmers, John and Sage, Mandy Culwell and Mandy and me...what a fun night!)

Sharing...

2008-11-04T10:36:00.002-06:00

Well, thanks for the comments, those of you who left them. I guess I need to make one thing kinda understood before I go into what I was going to write. I know I share a LOT of stuff on this blog but the truth is, this is not even half of what is going on with me. There are lots of private things or things that I don't want the world to know. So please know that I am using caution when writing on here. I have a few very select friends that I tell everything to and that are very wise to give me godly council. Anyway, so I hope that helps some of you to be assured that I'm not just blabbing everything that goes on with my life. :) I DO wish this was the extent of everything though! :)

So a few nights ago I was having a hard time just dealing with everything in life. Knowing I needed to trust God for everything in my life but also being scared of what might actually BE His plan for my life. With what's happened already in my life I basically felt like, "okay, I'm cursed, one bad thing after another with me" You'll be shocked that I'm even admitting this, but I had a VERY VERY hard time grasping the fact that this God who took my Mom, and put me in these other situations actually loves me! I'll be honest, I couldn't believe that. In my head I knew He did, ( "I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.") (Psalm 37:28, 1 John 4:9-11) Anyway, I mean I know His word, I know he "loves" us, but it was hard for me to actually in my heart to grasp this and believe it.

My friend was trying hard to get me to accept that yes, He does love me and that taking my Mom wasn't a punishment and that her death wasn't my fault. (which that's another issue, but we wont go into that!) :) So anyway, I got offline and just was laying in my bed praying. And then I was encouraged to try something new and to just lay there and listen to God. I tried to block everything else out of my mind and just to be still before God. I was expecting something great to happen, but really it was just a time for me to be still. So next morning I woke up feeling okay I guess, still lost in knowing what to actually think. So I got out my journal and started to write and all of a sudden the name Joseph pops into my head. I was thinking...oookay, why in the world am I thinking about Joseph?? (At this point I was writing in my journal about how can I accept God loves me?) So then it clicked!!!!!! :) I immediately started remembering about Joseph's life. God LOVED Joseph, it's very clear. But look at all the things Joseph went through. I can't imagine being sold into slavery and then being falsely accused and thrown into prison for so many years. Just all the things that Joseph, my troubles don't even compare. And I'm sure that in the midst of all these bad things happening, Joseph might have had a little doubt, wondering why God had forsaken him. When your in the middle of the situation it's hard to see that God has a purpose for what is happening. Looking at Joseph's life though it's very clear to me why those things had to happen to Joseph. It was all part of a bigger plan for his life. I want that for my life! I want to trust God now that He is in control and He IS a loving God and that everything that is happening to me now are just pieces to a big puzzle that will be completed soon. And that one day God will be glorified through my life and others will be able to say, "See, this is why her Mom had to die so young" or "This is why she had to have that job!" Just different things like that.

So, I know this is a small thing and very obvious to all of you, but I'm mainly just sharing to show you how God was so faithful to me in that desperate time of needing answers. :) I know there are many examples in scripture that are like this, but God chose to you Joseph at that time with me. :) I'm so greatful to Him for that. A sudden joy came over me when realizing that I do have a Savior that loves me deeply and has a love for me that I don't deserve at all.

Well that was it.....pretty much everything I was wanting to share. Hopefully it can be somewhat encouraging to you guys. Maybe scary to some that I was even thinking these things... :( Thanks be to God though that I am out of that pit now! :)

Praise The Lord!

2008-10-31T16:08:00.003-05:00

I'm NORMAL!!! :) Okay, that sounds a little weird, but after waiting what felt like ALL day, the nurse called me to let me know that my blood work came back within normal range!! :) Thanks be to God, because even the doctor is amazed with this. I have been praying that God would just heal me and some friends of mine were praying the same and that my results would come back normal and they did! :) My potassium is now back to 5.0! The nurse said, "I don't know what your doing but keep it up and keep drinking lots of water and stay away from that potassium!" She said I could reward myself like once a month with a banana! :D Anyway, I am thrilled as I'm sure you can tell.

Today was a fun day. Logan was off school yesterday and today so today was our "party" day. :) We started off our day by making cupcakes and finishing up our crafts. :) Then the kids played outside for a little while since it's been BEAUTIFUL here! :) (upper 70's) So then Tara came over and we took the kids to the mall to kill sometime. Not that the mall is a great spot to kill time, but we had a reason...they have a pet store! :) We all LOVED looking at the cute little pups and then actually went in a room and held one. He was adorable and we named him Yoshi! If only we had 500 dollars to spend on a puppy. I'm not even an animal fan, but this little guy stole my heart! He was some kind of mix..think they called him a peekadoodle or something! :) I know it was part poodle. :D He would only get to 8-12 lbs too!! :) Aw, I wanted him! :)
So after the pet store we made our way to Brunswick Zone XL :) It was So much fun! It's supposed to be a bowling alley but we didn't even bowl. They have laser tag and a HUGE arcade! :) (no, it's not like chuckie cheese) All of us enjoyed it! Tara and I didn't play laser tag, but we went in with the kids and well sort of played cause we helped Hanah out! Boy, that was one good workout! :) Then we spent the next hour or so playing games. They had one thing that you just laid on and you watched the screen and between the movie and your chair shaking all around it felt like you were on a roller coaster! Ah,...the best! :) Bet your wondering..."Did she go for her, or the kids?" :D :D (This was my first time, so I didn't know about all the fun stuff) Anyway, then we went to lunch and came home, so we are all pretty exhausted!

(Hanah playing lazer tag..oh by the way, these are all cell phone pics, that's why they aren't too good!)

I'm really looking forward to being home this weekend!! I don't think we have any plans for tonight (might go play tennis) but then tomorrow I'm volunteering at the fall picnic in Winfield to do face painting! :) Should be fun! Then tomorrow evening I am going to a fall party with Mandy. It's with some old school friends of mine so that should be VERY interesting! I haven't seen these girls since I was umm..11??? WOW! It's been a long time, but it will be nice to see them all again. :) And as for Sunday, I'm not really sure. Sunday is usually our family day, so I'm sure we'll have something planned! It's always nice going home, that's for sure!

Okay, now I have a question for you all. Do you think it is foolish to give details on my whole life over a blog? When I share struggles or when I just tell norm

al info does it seem like too much? Lately I've been going through some hard things, especially last night and I'd love to blog and tell you what I've learned, but I've been cautioned by someone and well, just wanted to know all of your thoughts. Does it ever encourage you all to see what God's been teaching me or is it more of a sob story? Please if you read this leave me a comment and let me know your thoughts. And if I get the go ahead, I'll share what I learned this morning! :) (although you all know it already I'm sure!)
(Oh, Besh...the pic of me is on there for you! :D Thought your family would die laughing seeing that I went OUT OF THE HOUSE with pigtails in!)

A lot accomplished!

2008-10-28T15:39:00.005-05:00

Well with my day almost ending..or should I say my free time almost ending I thought I would update again. :) Today has been a pretty good day. I was feeling a little sick earlier but after a little nap, I was back to my normal self. I had a lot I wanted to get done today and thanks to God, I was able to get it all done and still have time to blog! :)

This morning I used all my time editing photos. If you ever check out my photo blog you'll know that I'm lacking there even more than I am with this one. It's not that I haven't taken pictures though, it's just that I've not taken the time to edit them. :) So finally today I got serious about it and editing about 30 or so pictures. I love doing it! Also I was working with John some with ideas for my new website!!!! He has been such a blessing to me with giving of so much of his time to help with this business. His whole family has actually been the reason why I'm pursuing it so much now. :) Thanks! So this morning John also put an ad on Craig's List for me to do work for people. (Scanning photos, slides, negatives...small editing jobs and photography I guess) Well right before he got offline he wrote and said that a lady had contacted him and wanted to know how much I charged for converting 8mm tapes to DVD! I could not believe that he got a response that quick! Thank you Jesus!! :) Now, it's still not sure I'll have the job, but at least someone was interested. :) Later on he called and said that a different man wanted 800 slides scanned and put on a DVD too! It's just incredible to me. I've had a hard time trusting that God would even bring any work. And not to say that I'll get these jobs or that work would stay this constant, but this has really been a jump start for my faith. :) Please be praying about this new business for me. Someone in my family is designing me a website right now and as soon as it's up I'll post a link here! :)

So then after Hanah went down for her nap I was able to work on all my other things. :) I think I told you about ordering the note cards. Well, they came in and I had to "package" them today. :) I'm going to try selling them 4 cards to a set. I know that's not very many, but they are kind of expensive to make so this way, it will be cheaper for whoever buys them. :) It was fun bundling them up though. Hopefully local shops will be willing to sell them for me.

So after that I framed some pictures that I had laying around. The one of Luke I'm going to give to Angie. She needs some more pictures for her office!

Lastly, I needed to frame the article that came out while I was in Oklahoma. Several weeks ago Jami, a reporter for the Suburban Journal interviewed Mandy and I. She had done an article on us while filming "Dancing With Angels" So anyway, it finally came out and ended up being on like the second page, we were amazed. We were figuring it'd go to the Health section or something. :) When I got home though, I had like 9 copies of this article waiting for me. I have some nice family and friends. :) They were all saving it for us! Someone had suggested cutting the article out and framing it to preserve it, so I did. :) That was a little more complicated than sticking a picture in. I cut it up into different sections than taped it in. :) Doesn't look too pretty, but it works. :) If anyone would like to read the article just click HERE

Besides this I've had a lot on my mind. With the help of some very kind and honest friends ;), I've learned that I am not a confident person at all and have a hard time trusting. Or if I do trust it's those small things like "Oh Danielle, did you know gullible is written on the ceiling?" I trust THAT, but I don't trust that what they are honestly telling me is true. Or that they are choosing to be my friend. Instead I think, "Oh they just feel sorry for me" And with the confidence, I'm not really sure how to change that, but I realize I DO need to change. I can be confident in Jesus Christ. Also I have to realize that although my goal is always to be perfect, it will never happen. Not on this earth, so I need to lower my goals a tad bit, so I don't stay frustrated in life all the time. When I say my goals, I mean for worldly things, like being a good tennis player, or piano player, or photographer. :) These are all things that I just assumed I should be perfect at, and well....it didn't happen that way. I fail, over and over and over. So...I'm trying to realize now that if I set my goals a little lower maybe, just MAYBE one day I'll be able to accomplish them. :) Wont that be nice? ;)

Well, Logan will be home very soon. So I better get going. Check out my photography blog for some of those pics I edited! ;)

Life can be hard...

2008-10-27T13:36:00.004-05:00

Sometimes I wish that life could just freeze for a little while. That I could just step back from the situations around me and have time to think, pray and just fully comprehend what is going on around me. Life has been going so fast though that I feel lost in the midst of it. So many new things happening or coming up that I just don't know what to think of it all.

A very big thing that is going on right now is my health condition. I guess last I told all of you, my results came back good and I was feeling good, right? Well, I still technically am feeling good, if not better than before, but my blood work is not so good. :( That first time getting it drawn it came back saying that I was a little high in potassium and calcium but the concern was for my lack of fluids. I was very dehydrated. So, they asked me to drink a lot more water and then get more blood taken when I got home from OK. Soo...I did that. I drank a lot of water at the Naylors house and was just expecting my blood work to come back normal. So, I got home got more blood work last Thursday and then on Friday before leaving for IL, I got the call that my blood counts weren't so good. My calcium had gone up to 11, which is higher than normal, but not dangerous, but that my potassium was at a "dangerous" level. I couldnt' tell if it was something I should be worried about or not and she said, "well, it's not good. You could have a heart attack or kidney failure" She thought for sure that I must be taking a lot of potassium in my diet, but I'm not, so basically it's left unexplained for now. No one knows where all the potassium is coming from, but we have to get it under control. I am scheduled to get MORE blood drawn this Thursday and we'll go from there. My counts were at 5.6 and according to some websites, if your potassium level reaches 6.0 you should be hospitalized. (I don't plan on doing that) Along with my abnormal blood work I've also had some water retention, (just last night, but it scared me to death) My hand was like SOO puffy...Anyway, I called my doctor today and am waiting to hear back about that.

I guess just with all this going on it leaves me thinking a lot. Life is short...for some people 48 years while some only 3 years. Who knows how long we each have? I guess I'm just trying hard to trust God through all of this. Please pray for Mandy through all this also though. She is having a hard time with it. It's scary...I dont want to talk about it with her though, because it scares her almost as much as it scares me. Lord willing, nothing will be wrong though and maybe the blood tests were just messed up.

Another thing that has been on my mind SO much is my job. I'm currently working VERY hard to get my photography business up and going. Not only photography stuff though. I'm also trying to do more small editing jobs and DVD presentations for people and scanning work for others. John has helped me a lot with ideas, and the whole Naylor family actually. I just got some blank notecards printed with a pic I took on the front. And I'm going to try to sell packages of those at local shops. It's another area of trust for me. I want to be able to just have this one business but it takes a leap of faith to leave my job here and start doing just photo stuff. Also, I'm not totally sure it's God's will that I leave. If ANY of you have any idea to help me with this or have friends who need some sort of work done, please PLEASE think of me. :) I'm currently getting a website made and working on business cards.

Well, I had a lot more to write but due to other things I can't right now. Check back soon though to see photos from my trip to OK and to read about it! :)

PRAISE GOD!

2008-10-10T17:10:00.003-05:00

I have like NO time at all to blog, but wanted to tell you all....

I HAVE NO BRAIN TUMORS!!!! Praise God for the great results! :) The nurse had me terrified on the phone because she said there was an abnormality but then she went on to say it was with my left ear canal!!!! YAY! So they just referred me to a ENT to see what I can do for it. :) Now this will help with the dizzy symptoms, as for the fatigue, we are still working on that..I'm trying to drink that water! ;)

Anyway, thank you all SOOO much for the prayers!!!

oh, here are some photos from today! :)

Anxious

2008-10-10T06:46:00.002-05:00

I'm sick and not even sure why....It is very uncommon for me to wake up at 6:00 with no alarm and this morning I did. I've just been laying in my bed and getting myself so worked up about little things. I don't know why I'm feeling so sick, I can't even pin point it to one things, seems like lots of things. I guess the biggest thing may be that I will possibly get my results today from the MRI.

Yesterday was one tough day. As you all knew I was scared about the MRI but on Wednesday I was feeling better about it and then even Thursday morning early I wasn't too scared. But it definitely hit me when I was driving to the hospital. :( I wasn't actually afraid of the MRI, but the results. I guess it may be hard for you all to understand. But knowing that when my Mom first got her MRI done she didn't know anything was wrong and then lived only 5 months after that first one. That is scary! I shouldn't be scared, but I am and was. Anyway, thank you to all those who were praying for me. My sister Tara ended up coming up to the hospital to be with me. I didn't do too good of a job at hiding how scared I was. :( I survived the MRI though and am now just waiting on results. I'm so hoping they come today only so I can get some sleep tonight. :)

Like I said though, I'm not really sure this is the reason why I'm so anxious. There is one other small tiny area that it could be, but who knows. Also, I'm flying to Oklahoma tonight so maybe I'm just super excited about that!! :)

I wanted to also let you all know my blood work came back. The doctor said that my thyroid count was within NORMAL range! :shock: It was certainly on the low end of normal, but still normal, so nothing to worry about there. The only problems with it were that I was really dehydrated and didn't have enough electrolytes in my body and then I also had too much calcium and potassium in my blood. That part didn't make sense to me at all. People have actually told me I should take calcium supplements because I don't drink milk and stuff, so who knows where all the calcium is coming from. :) The doctor ordered another blood test though, so when I'm home from OK, I'll have to get MORE blood work. :( That's okay though, I guess she just wants to make sure that my counts are high and if so then she'll do even MORE specific blood tests to find out why it is. She said it was nothing to worry about though, they weren't that high, just a little above normal. She was mostly worried about my electrolytes and of course me getting the MRI. She said since the blood work came up with no reason for me to be dizzy, the MRI was crucial. Maybe she said that to just worry me though......

I may or may not get my results today from the MRI, but whenever I do, I'll post it on here...Now if it's bad, I wont be posting for awhile probably. Not sure I'll feel up to blogging if they find tumors or something..but I'm trying hard to just trust the Lord that there will be NO tumors and my brain will be fine!!!

Thank you again for all the prayers!! It really means a lot to me!

Scared...

2008-10-07T18:35:00.002-05:00

Well, as some of you may know, (not many) but I have been having some weird health problems lately. I guess it's sort of been since the beginning of summer. I've just been SOO overally tired, even with hours and hours of sleep, and then also have been quite dizzy lately. I understand that being tired doesn't seem like a normal reason to see a doctor, but I'm telling you, I'm ALWAYS tired. So anyway...last week my dizzy problems got worse and I almost blacked out twice. :( That got me pretty scared and those who heard about it scared so I was convinced to go see a doctor this week before leaving for Oklahoma.

So, today was the big day. I went to the doctor and explained my symptoms and so she told me the dizziness can be from a virus. She said it lasts 5-7 days and then is gone. Since my is lasting longer than that and I had some numbness with it, she was thinking something else COULD be wrong...So, THEN she found out about my Mom and told me I should have an MRI on my brain. :( At the time of her telling me I wasn't scared..not at all, I just thought it was kind of foolish to get it done. But now, the later the day gets the more scared I'm getting. I don't want my family to know I'm scared though....I guess it just brings up a lot of memories of my Mom being sick and getting MRI after MRI done on her. I've had an MRI done once, but it was on my knee and so that's what else is scary. This is on my HEAD! Anyway, I am trying so hard to not let this scare me, and to not let my family know how scared I am. :( I was thinking though...what IF they found something? I've always said I want nothing more than to be with my Mom.... :( Maybe this is why I have no prospects for marriage or why my life is this way...none of us know how much longer we have to live. Just a lot to think about.

Anyway, they also drew a lot of blood today so I should find out by Thursday what's going on with that. She thinks it's just my thyroid, which I'm fine with, that's better than tumors. Praise the Lord too, because I didn't get woosy or pass out when they took my blood! This is the first time I felt good after getting it done and it was a HUGE needle! OH BOY! I'm so thankful though that it didn't hurt or anything.

Please just be praying for me though, I know I just need to trust God with this. My life is in HIS hands. Oh and if your Mandy or Tara reading this...just pretend you didn't.

50 years....

2008-10-01T22:22:00.002-05:00

Well I've just been sitting here....not sure what to write. I have tons of emotions going through me right now and SO much going on in my head. I try to not let these "dates" through the year get me upset, but I'm human and they do. The more I dwell on them though the worse it is. Tomorrow, October 2nd, my Mom would have been 50 years old. I remember when she turned 40 and my older sister tried planning a surprise party for her, which flopped and I just remember thinking.. by the time she is 50 I'll be old enough to give her a HUGE Surprise party! Then when my Mom was sick and we weren't able to celebrate her 48th very much I just kept telling myself, okay, when she turns 50 I'll have a HUGE party. Well tomorrow is that day, and my Mom isn't even there. She didn't make it to 50....That's hard for me. I know people who have been MARRIED 50 years, but my Mom couldn't even live 50 years. Doesn't seem fair.

Yesterday I had a really hard time with wanting my Mom here. I know several of you have lost someone close to you, a son, grandparent, friend...and it's never easy but losing my Mom feels like the hardest thing in the world. She left me at such a crucial time in my life I feel like. NOTHING has been easy since she died and it's like my anchor in life is gone. I just cried and cried last night talking to Tara, almost screaming because I wanted my Mom back so badly. I just want to wake up from this bad dream a
nd have her here. I'm learning such a hard lesson and wish there was an easier way. I'm realizing that God DOES have a plan for my life but it's so different than I'd ever have for myself. I'll be honest, it's almost like God's given me the plan for my life and I have to read it, but it's all in Chinese..I DONT GET IT! I wish so much the plan for my life could be easily laid out in front of me, but God doesn't do that. I KNOW He is faithful! Hebrews 10:23 "Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful." It's the trusting part that doesn't come easy with me. PLEASE PLEASE be praying for me with this. I need to trust him with my job situation, with understanding why he took my best friend- my Mom, and with my life. I'm so weak though and I believe I probably struggle more with this than anyone. :(

I know my Mom can't read my blog or know my thoughts, but I'm hoping God does a special favor and will at least let my Mom know that I love her more than anything and that I miss her. I can't wait to be in Heaven with her. Happy Birthday Mom!

Happy Birthday to a sweet friend!

2008-09-24T06:00:00.002-05:00

16 years ago today, a very sweet, wonderful girl was born!! :) ANNA RUTH MORRIS!!!!! For the short time I have known her, she has grown to be one of my closest friends I have. :) Since she is SO different than her sister Bethany, I wont do this blog post to embarrass her but to let you all know how wonderful she is! :) I'll post 16 pictures and write 16 things about her!!! :) (c'mon it is her SIXTEENTH birthday!) ;)

1. Very, very VERY sweet and kind

2. Would never want to hurt ANYONE's feelings

3. Quiet but loves to have fun!

4. LOVES cows

5. A wonderful photographer!

6. A "little mom" to most of her siblings

7. SO selfless, I mean she always denies her self even if it's something she really wants to do

8. A willing servant to those around her

9. One of the best piano players I have EVER heard... I am not joking! :)

10. Bakes the best desserts!

11.She has a very keen eye to see "detections" "Y"

12. Likes to laugh a lot! :)

13. A wonderful friend and a godly example to many! :)

14. Anna LOVES to be called "AHna" You know, where it sounds all proper! :) (okay, I'm totally just kidding, she does NOT like it! :D)

15. I like to tease Anna that she has many options in life... "5 C's" Remember them, or would you like me to list them all? :D

16. Proverbs 31:10 "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies" This

verse very much so describes my dear friend, Anna!(This is what Anna would have looked like in 1976!!!! BEAUTIFUL, HUH? )

LOVE YOU AHNA! ;)

Just for Fun...

2008-09-18T21:52:00.004-05:00

As you know, Kim is out of town this weekend so Mandy has been staying with me here. Well tonight after getting home from work we decided to get some "fun" pictures on photobooth..sorta like ol' times! :) (We used to do that a lot) Hey..I should post some really old pics sometime of us doing this...anyway! Just thought I'd share some of these with you...some are just way too crazy to even post. Here's what we did though...we'd push the button and then strike a "pose" whenever it was ready to go off, so neither of us knew what the other was doing... :)

Here they are!

(We were going for a certain look here!) :{}

(Dont we look just SO much alike?)